It was -20C last night in Montreal, when we sat to our nice dinner, in an upscale Italian restaurant. It’s the sort of place, where the waiters are better dressed than the patrons. So posh and comfy that I even broke me long restraint and had two glasses of red wine … nice Chianti from Piedmont. We were an Iranian, two Egyptians, one Brit, an American and three Canadians. But fine wine knows no boundaries and except for me, everyone was soon drinking up to everyone’s good health, and bursting with fun and laughter.
It was somewhere between the Bisque and the Antipasto, that the main door opened and in rushed a young and tall fellow - wearing a black T shirt, waving a small object and yelling some obscenities! We all froze and could only watch the young punk as he kept running from side-to-side and screaming … except for our good American guest, of course; who quickly did a duck-and-cover under the table … as any experienced Texas dweller would do.
Everyone shows their true color under pressure, and my came out black. Later on, I again had to beg and explain to my good wife that unlike her, I am an old fogie - full of stories that need to be told. There is no way that this shit can die with me and occupy the same coffin! The black ink is calling me as much as the pink, Gucci shoes attract her. “But you sink too much time and attention into that freakish website!” she complained. So I had to promise, “Only stories my dear … only stories … and no time and energy on comments and debates.”
In the US of A, someone would have probably shot that crazy young drug addict, before he could have a chance to possibly shoot out the whole restaurant. But here in Montreal, a burly Garçon simply grabbed the boy by the neck and threw him out. His small object proved to be a shoe-horn! It is so good to live in a country where it takes a year and 20 background checks to buy a handgun … even if it is freezing cold for 6 months of the year!
Needless to say, I again had a bout of heart palpitation and headache, which I fully blame the Piedmont Chianti for the both. But what can I do? Canadian tort law doesn’t cover wine damages.
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