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Islam, Chelokabab and Wet T-Shirt
01-Jun-2012
During a three-night stay in Vancouver, I was invited to a condo party. My friend’s posh condo was walking distance from the hotel … I was alone, and he was trying to pay off prior dinners at our place.
It turned out to be a “get to know your Persian neighbor” party. Most people at the simple dinner were FOB (fresh off the boat) Iranians – with more money than any of us mere mortals can ever count. Hence, their surprise to meet someone like me … a “veritable” Canadian-Iranian in shorts and sandals … while 90% of the men in attendance were wearing three-piece suites!
Don’t know about you guys, but I am not going to wear tie to a condo party-room. Besides, I was wearing my bathing suit underneath, for a swim in the promised deluxe condo pool.
One of the new condo owners in attendance, was an ex IRI chief of one thing or the other (a hairy and ugly creature, whom I shall call Mr. Mohr Pishoni) … with a pretty wife who was searching for a low-cost English as Second Language class.
Anyhow, I was standing there like a sore thumb, trying to be friendly and helpful towards various inquiries and questions. But it was clear that the well dressed crowd was simply confused by my presence; and was even dreading the thought of turning into a slob like me, in 10-20 years.
The reception was chips and pop … and the meal was Chelokabab, served out of big aluminum containers onto plastic plates. If E.E. is reading this … you still owe me a proper dinner, dude!
Thanks god for the line-up and mayhem associated with the grand opening of the Chelokabab aluminum-containers, which allowed me to sneak out. Tired and bored, I decided to use the nice condo pool for some cool down.
It was between the 5th and the 6th lap that I noticed the strangest thing in the world. Mrs. MP came to the pool area, all clad and covered in shirt, pants and scarf.
Trying hard to maintain my coordination, and prevent chlorinated water from entering me lungs … I carried on, wondering what she was going to do. Well, she stepped gingerly into the hot-tub by the pool, and sat there immersed to her neck.
After 15 minutes, when she stood up – I realized how much sexier the all-clad and wet woman’s body can be, compared to the swimsuit. Again more pool water entered my respiratory system, but it was worth the good look at that wet and plum figure.
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Willing to bet
by Reality-Bites on Mon Jun 04, 2012 10:53 AM PDTMrs. MP was wearing a g-string under the ridiculous wet IR outfit.
I m realy mad now
by مآمور on Sun Jun 03, 2012 06:12 PM PDThow many times do i have to repeat myself before u can get it around and in your head? I dont do flagging.
yes, I am jumping in the water to get rid of my madness and i hope, u get wet too!!
I wear an Omega watch
وای که اهل حیفا چقدر ناز هستند!!
مآمورSun Jun 03, 2012 01:55 PM PDT
I wear an Omega watch
no way mamooreh joon!
by mousa67 on Sun Jun 03, 2012 01:32 PM PDTi'm not into threesome with you shia temptresses. last time, it was me, my "girlfriend" fatty comanodo (ex press tv reporter) and my good iranian friend mohsen. and i got, let's say, the "raw end" of the deal. & guess what, i paid for the event.
i'm telling you again, avoid shazdeh & his friends. come back to me. stop being angry. stop flagging me. i buy you a brand new pink unicorn computer with in built camera.
مردم مظلوم
Shazde Asdola MirzaSun Jun 03, 2012 01:25 PM PDT
God bless your peace loving soul.
Mr mousa u can join me and shazdeh
by مآمور on Sun Jun 03, 2012 01:20 PM PDTlook shazdeh! I did what I promised to do! I m living up to our contract!!
now, I m waiting for u by the pool!!
Mousajan, u, by far, r my best buddy in here!! u r traveling with me and that means a lot!!! no one replaces a real chosen zionist not even a fake shazdeh!!!
not to speak of your servents like the rest of them!!
no, u r the last frontier to conquer the last fighter to defeat! before the Iranian flag goes on the dome of Al-Quids
I wear an Omega watch
Dear Shazdeh
by Mardom Mazloom on Sun Jun 03, 2012 01:19 PM PDTI hope not ... God willing, they'll all go back to hell without that any bomb drops on Iran.
i'm really upset seeing you guys ganging up on my mamooreh.
by mousa67 on Sun Jun 03, 2012 12:57 PM PDT'he' is sweet, cute and fascinated by the missiles shape. it's width & length.
mamooreh joon, stop talking to shazdeh. he is the kind of guy your parents always told you to avoid . you need the shoulder of a nice friendly jew like me to lean on. come talk to me, your uncle mousa. why are you ignoring me? what did is say? what did i do?
Mamoor jon: Did you
by vildemose on Sun Jun 03, 2012 12:18 PM PDTMamoor jon: Did you ever work in Evin?? Did your father ever work in Evin or for khomeini??
Does Khamenie deposit money into your account directly from his own account or his son's account in London?
What did your parents do before the revolution??
All Oppression Creates a State of War--Simone De Beauvoir
مردم و مأمور عزیز
Shazde Asdola MirzaSun Jun 03, 2012 11:55 AM PDT
Don't worry ... soon you'll both get a chance at that bombing and missile action ... satan willing.
Dear Oon Yaroo,
by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sun Jun 03, 2012 11:52 AM PDTاون یاروی عزیز: اجازه ما هم دست شماست
با تشکر از عکس الصاقی ... یک فروند موشک ضد هوایی ... مستقر در قزوین
اینهم جهت دست شما درد نکنه:
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3nNmcAJgtU&feature=related
فانوس خانم: چراغ خونه تون روشن، ولی این مأمور نرقصه بهتره
Shazde Asdola MirzaSun Jun 03, 2012 11:43 AM PDT
Especially in bikini, with hairy chest and limbs ...
//www.youtube.com/watch?v=77RlbZUTeYQ
And you, haji,
by Mardom Mazloom on Sun Jun 03, 2012 10:43 AM PDTgo back to hell where your belong to. Don't forget to bring Mahmood shepesh and all the ajeneh occupying Iran with you!
Shazdeh Gerami, baa ejazeh! Mamoor aziz ....
by Oon Yaroo on Sun Jun 03, 2012 10:34 AM PDTas you wish sharp objects falling upon Haifa please bear in mind that the reciprocals may also seek you specially when you are in the same position as the fellow Boshkehmate in the middle of the pre-Boshkeh ritual in Qom below....!
//iranian.com/main/blog/zia111-1
fascinated by mamor
by مآمور on Sun Jun 03, 2012 10:21 AM PDTgo back to Haifa where u belong to, stop by Mahmood Abbass' home,
watch the sky direction north
I wear an Omega watch
ما عاشق عشقیم و مسلمان دگر است // مامور میمون است و عقلش نمک است
Mardom MazloomSun Jun 03, 2012 09:56 AM PDT
Someone stole my Omega watch
ایران ۱ـازبکستان ۰
مآمورSun Jun 03, 2012 09:36 AM PDT
یک پرتاب آزاد ولی از نوع موشکی برای وسط دروازه حیفا !!
I wear an Omega watch
delivering pizza at night, blogging for Haifa in the morning
by مآمور on Sun Jun 03, 2012 09:22 AM PDTI wear an Omega watch
Agha Shazdeh, Mamoor bayast berakhseh!
by fanoos on Sun Jun 03, 2012 08:58 AM PDTHopefully, with the turquoise bikinis on!
خدایا: همه رو برق میگیره ... ما رو چراغ نفتی
Shazde Asdola MirzaSun Jun 03, 2012 08:45 AM PDT
Bad Stories for Bad Kids
shazdeh likes chelokabab from Cazba
by مآمور on Sun Jun 03, 2012 08:22 AM PDTI wear an Omega watch
شازده خشکش قشنگه
مآمورSun Jun 03, 2012 08:20 AM PDT
I wear an Omega watch
Dear Mardom Mazloom
by Shazde Asdola Mirza on Sun Jun 03, 2012 08:15 AM PDTHis problem seems not to be just with the language, but with the thought process itself.
"تو هم دفعه بعد که آمدی ونکوور با هم میریم استخر"
Shazde Asdola MirzaSun Jun 03, 2012 08:12 AM PDT
Yes, then afterwards the Vancouver papers will likely report:
"Iranian blogger was drowned in the pool, by a hired IRI agent."
Mamoor jon: you are simply too obvious!
نه ریاضیات پیش کشت!
Mardom MazloomSun Jun 03, 2012 09:57 AM PDT
Someone stole my Omega watch
دیدی گفتم!!حالا ریاضی هم باید درسم بدی!!
مآمورSat Jun 02, 2012 11:20 PM PDT
I wear an Omega watch
شازده جان،
Mardom MazloomSat Jun 02, 2012 11:00 PM PDT
انگلیسی مآمور حرفی نداره، ولی فکر کنم از فارسیش بهتر باشه !
//iranian.com/main/blog/fre-891
معیادگاه عاشقان
مآمورSat Jun 02, 2012 10:50 PM PDT
شازده بیا با هم به قول خارجیها دیل کنیم!!
من می آیم در بلاگ تو و کاری می کنم که بیشترین دید و نظر را بگیره!
تو هم دفعه بعد که آمدی ونکوور با هم میریم استخر و تو به من درس فارسی بده!!
باشه؟؟؟
I wear an Omega watch
"مثل آن دیگری هفته پیش نشد!!"
Shazde Asdola MirzaSat Jun 02, 2012 09:25 PM PDT
Your Persian is even more entertaining than your English ... please don't stop ... please!!
نه!!!!نشد
مآمورSat Jun 02, 2012 09:18 PM PDT
این بلاگ مثل آن دیگری هفته پیش نشد!!
از آن که یافتت نمی شود نگو!!از آن که میسوزاندت و خاکسترت میکند بگو!!
I wear an Omega watch