by minadadvar

The intensity and tenacity of couples' reaction to divorce are dependent on many factors including but not limited to :

   1)Psychological make-up of the individuals:  Ego strength, maturity and high self-esteem mediate the effects of the symptoms.  Those with a history of earlier trauma(s), especially those associated with loss and abandonment are more likely to be at risk for developing and sustaining severe and long-term symptoms.  Revolution, war and forced immigration have traumatized many Iranians.

   2)Strong social support:  Extended family, relatives and close friends who can provide emotional and practical assistance lessens the anxiety and loneliness that often experienced by couples at the time of transition.  Unfortunately "shame" and "fear of being judged negatively prevent many Iranians (especially women) from asking for help and/or sharing their sufferings.

   3)Age and number of children:  In general having more children and/or younger children is positively related to tenacity/intensity of the symptoms, especially feelings of being overwhelmed, anxiety and guilt regarding spending enough/quality time with chilren.  More women complain about this issue than men.  The fact that 90% of women(in U.S.A) are the custodial parents seem to explain the disparity.  Older children can be a source of support and comfort to parents.

   4)Education and financial resources:  The more educated and financially successful couples seem less symptomatic.  This is particularly true for women who have established careers.  Women with little education or those who are not employable during the time of transition are highly vulnerable.i

   5)The finalization of the divorce:  For most couples the speed with which the legal issues are settled and the divorce is finalized predit their level of anxiety.  In most cases the end of the legal issues give couples a sense of freedom to move forward.

Next I will discuss the impact of divorce on children.  I appreciate your comments.


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Great Insight and Help for Moms

by Jennifer (not verified) on

This is a wonderfully insightful article. Understanding the challenges of divorce is really important. But even women with established careers have lots of concerns in divorce. I offer free information to divorcing women with children at www.ResilientMom.com because when I was getting divorced, I found so little help.
Thanks for your article, and I look forward to the next post.