Divorce and Its Impact on Children (Part Four)


by minadadvar

The older-age children (nine to twelve year olds) show greatly enhanced capacity not only to understand the reality but also to employ more advanced coping skills to deal with the stress associated with their parents' separation and divorce.  They percieve the realities of therir family's disruption with startling soberness and clarity, particularly when compared with the younger children.  This group of kids try to cope by denial of marital rupture, reaching out to others for help, and engaging in new and exciting activities.  Despite therir success in many cases the family disruption and its consequences manifest itself in a decline in academic performance and and delinquent behaviors.  Somatic symptoms such as headaches and stomachaches and alignment with one parent against the other are common.

 The adolescents (thirteen to eighteen year olds) respond to family rupture with feelings of grief, anger, fear of failure (especially wtih regards to their own future relationships), loneliness and depression.  Many feel caught between the parents.  Some report that the toppling of the family structure has limited or entirely removed the family as a safe base and feel hurried and pressed to acheive independence quickly. The strategies that are most commonly used are either increased involvement and helpfulness or withdrawl and detachment from the family.

In summary the family rupture has negative effects on all children.  However there are many factors that can either mediate or intensify the imapct of separation/divorce.  Younger children are more vulnerable than older children,  a good relationship between the parents is positively associated with better adjustment, the maturity nad emotional well being of custodial parent enable the children to better cope with the crisis, the financial security and strong social support are helpful to children dealing with therir emotional difficulties.      



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I would be more careful

by MiNeum71 on

The papers I know say that also patchwork families work well, it depends on the parents acting parental and with love and also on the new partners.



Compare Impact of Divorce to Impact of a Bad Marriage on Kids

by t (not verified) on

No one argues that a divorce/separation has negative effects on children.

What would be more useful and practical is to analyze and discuss the impact of divorce/separation vs. a bad marriage on children. After all happily married people don't contemplate divorce.