Misc

The Groom

In response to "Mixed Culture Marriages"

My wife and I are the closest of friends and when explored, our culture is nearly indistinguishable. She and I both are highly educated and well respected contributors to society as are the families to which we were born. We love and respect each other and our families, all of which bond seamlessly.

This is rather unfortunate; I should not have to respond to something of such a nature but I feel obligated to do so.

You are proof that someone of seemingly back mountain upbringing and lack of education can heed anything but further stupidity.

Perhaps you are simply incapable of obtaining another Persian that could respect you enough to share anything meaningful such as marriage. A good Persian woman is strong, well mannered, educated and of high moral standing. I wish I could say the same of you.

Ignorance is an epidemic among some, including yourself... I suggest you seek help and spare your children the kind of embarrassment you cause yourself.

Quick Kiss

My wife is a very good woman from a very good family and out of respect was unsure of how to kiss me in front of family.

Please keep comments like this to yourself as you obviously know nothing of love and respect.

The Groom

In response to Keh Eshgh Aassaan Nemood Aval and the unsubstantiated statistic that he/or she so ill-stated...

Thank you for your initial kind words. As for the rest; You should be thoroughly ashamed of yourself. It sounds to me that you are of a family with little values or education and/or you have simply been hurt beyond repair.

In any case, I hope you find the kind of love, respect and union of family that my wife and I so fortunately have found.

A-mehr = Amor

Many years ago, I once read this article (in old book provided to me by an Italian friend/History teacher) that in ancient Persia, Love was called : A-mehr ! (written in Anciant Persian symbols & characters)
(A) prefix was representing something like Not going away!!! Which made A-mehr = Love that is not destructible.... Hence, the Latin equivelent of Amor, Amore & etc that were derived later from this ancient Persian word...
So despite of all the negative comments & possibilities about this nice couples future, I wish them & you all A-mehr for today & for the rest of your physical life...

And remember, Every thing in life is impermanent But LOVE........... So be nice... :-)

Peace & Love

Gotta throw my 2 cents in...

because this IS something I'm familiar with.  While it would be foolish to argue with statistics, I'm not sure I agree that inter-culture marriages are any less likely to succeed than others.  And without a doubt I can refute the comments made about sharing the language and the history.  Part of the fun...heck... a LOT of the fun of being married to an Iranian IS learning the language and the customs.  My husband takes great pleasure in my efforts... even though he might tease me at times.  I participate in... expose myself to... and encourage as much of this diverse and incredible culture as I can and I think I can speak for my husband when he says that he enjoys our Western history as well.  We discuss (many definitions of THAT word) differences and similarities all the time. It is unquestionably one of our greater strengths.  Maybe he's not the typical Iranian... maybe I'm not the typical American.  But I know this.  It's our differences that will make our marriage stronger.  BECAUSE we are different, our choice to be together is one of mutual respect and great great love. 

To: Rend-e Maykhaaneh

Now that you've explained your theory of Iranian-wife/American husband marriages [with which I am in strong disagreement based upon three decades of personal experience as the husband an Iranian wife], would you be so kind as to give us your thoughts on the Iranian-husband/American-wife marriages.

I expect that you will find Iranian husbands to be perfect husbands in mixed marriages; in contrast, to the very unflattering picture that you paint of American husbands in identical unions.

I realise that you aren't alone in the opinions you hold; I have met many Iranians over the years that think like you, so your views don't come as a real shock. I'm just glad that I didn't have to seek your permission 30 years ago to marry my wife. Her father, even back in the 70s was nowhere near as narrow-minded as your opinion seems to indicate that you may be.

Live long and prosper!

Mixed Culture Marriages

Whether a marriage works or not has nothing to do with what I or others writes in this platform. I certainly wish happiness and prosperity for all who enter into a “life-long” bonding with another Iranian or with persons of other cultures. However, the truth is that the great majority of mixed-culture marriages tend to fail. It really makes no difference whether the marriage is between an Iranian and an American, a Chinese and a Mexican, and a Moroccan and a Canadian. For every one marriage of this type that works there are many that fail.
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The cost failure for is not that great for an American man. He will easily fall in “love” with another woman and starts all over again. This is a disaster for an Iranian woman, however. The chance of she getting married again will be very low. At best, she will become a sex partner for another foreign man.
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One reason these marriages fail is because they do not have roots. Let say an Iranian and an American have know each other for 10 years (this is maximum). This means that they have a ten-year shared history, no more. Compare this with two Iranians who will have a root that is at least 3000 years old even if they did not know each other before marriage. For example, when one Iranian talks about Deev-e Sefid (White Demon) of Ferdowsi, both have memories of childhood when they read the story in their school text books, or listened to it on the radio and discussed with their parents. Now, what do these TWO words mean to an American: NOTHING.
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Now consider the families. American family immediately thinks of their bride as some one from the third world who is by design less them. Does an American family really think of their Iranian bride as an equal: hardly. Americans in general think that they are better than others, particularly better than us, the Middle Easterners. When it comes to bride’s family, the problem is even worse. One main issue is the language barrier. By nature of the American males rarely attempt to learn another language. Most American male that I have known refuse to learn Persian. More importantly, American male is the most selfish, the most self-centered male there is. The most important items for an American male are his career and his gentiles. If one is not going well for them, he scarifies all others.
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The Iranian female is not without fault either. They are generally living in the Aalam-e Happaroot (the unreal world). I have seen them getting into totally un-healthy and really destructive relationships. They are perhaps in search of the one and only, the one that does not look like anyone they have known before. Their marriage to a foreigner is to escape their real insecurities. Unfortunately, they get themselves into more troubles by doing so.
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These marriages follow their own patterns. Everything is good at first. The American male, who does not know Persian and refuses to learn it, will become uncomfortable around her friends. Then he refuses to go out with her relatives of her friends. Of course Iranian woman will comply and will always cover for him, like he is out of town; he is spending time with his parents, and so on. Eventually the marriage that began with love will becomes nothing other than a dormant cohabitation with little life in it. Unfortunately, many will not survive.

We are all aware.....

that the divorce rates have increased over the years through out the world in all ethnic groups and relgious/non-religious beliefs.

However, your statistics does not break up the figures into specific ethnic groups............etc.

The other individual claimed that 90% of mixed marriages end up in divorce without the data to back up the claim.

Solh va Doosti (paz a vosotros)

Nadia

You and I...

You and I may lie, but the numbers don't. I copied and pasted this information because you questioned what I said. Do a google search and you'll find a lot more of this stuff. As I said before may they live a happy and prosperous life before they get divorced:

"Here's a sampling of some of the most recently available statistics on marriage and divorce in the United States of America:
There were approximately 2,230,000 marriages in 2005 -- down from 2,279,000 the previous year, despite a total population increase of 2.9 million over the same period.
The divorce rate in 2005 (per 1,000 people) was 3.6 -- the lowest rate since 1970, and down from 4.2 in 2000 and from 4.7 in 1990. (The peak was at 5.3 in 1981, according to the Associated Press.)
The marriage rate in 2005 (per 1,000) was 7.5, down from 7.8 the previous year.
In 2004, the state with the highest reported divorce rate was Nevada, at 6.4 (per 1,000). Arkansas was a close second, with a divorce rate of 6.3, followed by Wyoming at 5.3. The District of Columbia had the lowest reported divorce rate, at 1.7, followed by Massachusetts at 2.2 and Pennsylvania at 2.5. (Figures were not complete for California, Georgia, Hawaii, Indiana, Louisiana, or Oklahoma.)
8.1% of coupled households consist of unmarried heterosexual partners, according to The State of Our Unions 2005, a report issued by the National Marriage Project at Rutgers University. The same study said that only 63% of American children grow up with both biological parents -- the lowest figure in the Western world.
As of 2003, 43.7% of custodial mothers and 56.2% of custodial fathers were either separated or divorced. And in 2002, 7.8 million Americans paid about $40 billion in child and/or spousal support (84% of the payers were male).

Percentage of population that is married: 59% (down from 62% in 1990, 72% in 1970) Percentage of population that has never married: 24% Percentage of population that is divorced: 10% (up from 8% in 1990, 6% in 1980) Percentage of population that is widowed: 7% Median age at first marriage: Males: 26.9
Females: 25.3 Median age at first divorce: Males: 30.5
Females: 29 Median age at second marriage: Males: 34
Females: 32 Median age at second divorce: Males: 39.3
Females: 37 Median duration of first marriages that end in divorce: Males: 7.8 years
Females: 7.9 years Median duration of second marriages that end in divorce: Males: 7.3 years
Females: 6.8 years Median number of years people wait to remarry after their first divorce: Males: 3.3 years
Females: 3.1 years Percentage of married people who reach their 5th, 10th, and 15th anniversaries: 5th: 82%
10th: 65%
15th: 52% Percentage of married people who reach their 25th, 35th, and 50th anniversaries: 25th: 33%
35th: 20%
50th: 5% Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 25: Males: 32%
Females: 50% Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 35: Males: 77%
Females: 84% Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 45: Males: 87%
Females: 90% Percentage of people who have ever been married by the age of 55: Both males and females: 95% Number of unmarried couples living together: 5.5 million Percentage of unmarried couples living together that are male-female unions: 89%"

Very Nice Sofreh Aaghad!

Beautiful ,,,, just loved it

Best wishes

Tandeese 

My wishes

I wish them the best of the best in their new lives, and I wish their love for eachother and their lives keeps growing everyday. 

One note to the producers ( EYES ),

In my opinion that was a wrong choice of the background music.

But, who am I ? 

To: Divorce and Rend-e Maykhaaneh

Shame on both of you for your very inappropriate comments. This couple just got married and you've already got them in divorce court. Either both of you have been smoking crack or you simply lack manners. Then, of course, perhaps it just rubs you the wrong way to see another beautiful Iranian girl walking down the isle with a foreigner. Perhaps, you haven't considered that the groom will not be the only foreigner in this marriage. It takes two to tango and when two people from different cultures marry, they both have to work harder at making it work than most couples since they are from different cultures. For some people the adjustments, sacrifices, and level of patience and understanding required in a inter-ethnic/inter-cultural marriage are simply too much, but for most who love, respect and show compassion for their mate, the payoff is worth it all.

Where in the world do you get the nutball notion that if the groom cannot understand azizam, gol-e man, eshghaman, dooset doram, manam dooset doram or a zillion other Persian words of love and endearment that he will be an unfit or unloving husband? By making such comments you are showing your prejudices.

I have now been married nearly 31 years with my Persian wife...and she isn't a second generation Iranian born in the U.S. She is the real McCoy straight from Khuzestan. Don't you imagine that she has learned just as much from me over the years as she has taught me? Marrige is a partnership in life. You may think that American men are incapable of loving our Iranian wives, but you would be mistaken. Sure, some marriages don't work out, but many of them do. The reasons they fail apart have less to do with cultural tension and more to do with personal conflicts, just as they do in any other marriage break up between two Americans or two Iranians. I remember before we got married, many of my wife's Iranian friends and all of my American friends strongly advised us not to marry. They said we were too different and that it could never work. Well thirty years later most of those friends have been through two or three divorces while we are still going strong. The best part of being married to an Iranian lady is that I get to wake up every morning next to the only woman I have ever loved and the only one that still turns me on. The ole girl may not be what she once was, but she'll always be more than enough woman for me! If I could go back in my life and do it over, I wouldn't change a think. My Iranian girl is the best thing to ever happen to me and I don't regret a thing, just as I'm sure the groom in the video will feel in future years! I hope this couple shares the same joy that we have had over the years and maybe when they are about to celebrate their 20th Anniversary, we will be celebrating our 50th.

Beautiful couple,I have an advice for you ...

Mixed marriages are wonderful,because it is known fact that when races mix the children are healthier and smarter.so you beautiful couple enjoy your union,but remember the secret to an everlasting marriage is :

""if the marriage is based both on the spirit and the body, that union is a true one, hence it will endure. If, however, the bond is physical and nothing more, it is sure to be only temporary, and must inexorably end in separation.""

Best wishes,
Tahirih

Our mixed marriages are

Our mixed marriages are twice the fun.

This wedding video reminds

This wedding video reminds me of my own. What's up with pessimism people. I've been married to an American for 11 years and going strong. Where did that one moron get his stats from...Dr. Laura. My husband is more Irooni than I am. My kids are gorgeous as well. Mixed marriages are fabulous and I don't have some annoying Iranian mother-in-law to take care of either.

THE KISS

NIKI, read what I wrote before you decide to respond.

I said it didn't have to be obnoxious, but it doesn't have to be cold either.

so tasteful...

an intelligent union of iranian american traditions... wishing a happy life together.

Takleef cheeyeh?

 Now I believe in American tradition, the bride's family pays for the wedding, and in ours, the groom's. In this situation, where it is International, what does the etiquette dictate?

Velcome to Zee Family My Boy ;0)

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvhkaOVjkm4

Don Corleone

PS: Sorry Couldn't help myself ;0) But All the Best to the Happy Couple and Wishing you all the success in fullfilling your Dream Come True;

Keh Eshgh Aassaan Nemood Aval

Good luck to both of them. However, the last 30 years have shown us that a good 90% of such mixed-culture marriages will not last. This couples spent way too much money for a 10 percent chance of winning. As the real Rend would say: Keh esgh aassan nemood aval, vali oftaad mokel haa.

To the kiss interpreter

did you expect her to stick her tongue down his throat and for him to hump her leg as a show of their long lasting commitment and marriage?

The more mundane reasons are probably that a) A kiss is a very intimate act and they are being watched by hundreds of eyes, thus making them nervous/timid.  b) She probably doesn't want to smear her lipstick, for the sake of the photos! 

QUICK KISS

A quick kiss only means she doesn't love him and is only putting on a show. I would leave my lips with my beloved for as long as he would want me to. Doesn't have to be obnoxious, it can be beautiful, loving, romantic, and poetic.

what a beautiful bride

and wedding.lucky man.

did you guys notice how quick she stopped kissing him?that's my irooniiiii!!

Kooftesh besheh! :-)

Dokhtare Irooni ro bord!!

I see a lot of pessimism expressed as to how long this will last!

I wish them a happy life and hope this would bring Iranians and Americans a step closer!

Filming was terrible unless the low resolution was intentional!

Persian Wedding

if it was a Iranian American wedding why they just put the Arabic book and what about the song it was not Persian or American I don't thing it will last beacus it started with one sided culture
i hope that he didnt convert to islam

It won't last? Why not?

Anyone can learn Farsi, me for example. My Iranian azizam has taught me many words and phrases and I'm currently taking a language course. I speak simple sentences to her and I'll only improve with time. I already know enough to tell "Divorce" boro baba.

May you live a happy and prosperous life

...before you get divorced!

Congrats and may you have a

Congrats and may you have a happy and long blissful life together.

Wow! Now.......

that is a wedding to remember. May they have many.............years of happiness together. :o)

Solh va Doosti (paz a vosotros)

Nadia

It won't last

Clearly, the bride is Iranian, and the groom American. But I bet you the marriage won't last...

1). How is the woman suppose to express herself in farsi to the guy? For example, she'll want to say "Azizam...ghorboonet beram..." and the guy will be like "Uhhh, what did you say?"

2). If arguement #1 isn't convinving, then consider the Iranian MADAR-ZAN!!! God help this guy.

I give them 8 months, 1 year max until they divorce.