Shit that keeps me up

Siamack Baniameri
by Siamack Baniameri

I often wonder what happens if a suicide bomber finds out that one of his 40 virgins is not a virgin.

What is the return policy in heaven?

Can the bomber get a refund? Is there an exchange program?

Do they have plastic surgeons on-call to patch up the damaged good?

What if the bomber is a homosexual? Can he request for male virgins instead? How would the gay suicide bomber tell if his 40 male virgins are really virgins?

Shit like this keeps me up all night!


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If he knew as much as Mr. President...

by KAMMO (not verified) on

Imagine if you did mention being gay. If he knew as well as Ahmadinejad, he'd kindly inform you that you don't even exist!


Just wondering....

by Niloo on

LOL, this was funny....but I thought it was 72 virgins...! Downsizing in heaven as well? Times really must be tough!


Chances are none of them are virgins...

by MeyBokhor_Manbarbesuzan on

When one looks at how God goes around carrying out his business with women without violating their virginity, chances are none of the presented women will be virgins. I think the martyrs, upon arrival in heaven, should look out for dipers, goats and three pedophile old men presenting themselvs as wise men.


i asked

by zigourat on

As a gay iranian during our religious class (ta'limat dini) I asked to my teacher when he started talking about martyr and all religious bullshit (it was during Iran-Irak war) what if the martyr is a woman (i was'nt enough 'kale khar' to mention the word gay in front of my reigious teacher). As usual he return his classical answer : don't annoy me with your stupid questions.