Declassified guide to party survival.


by sahar94

Family gatherings at an Iranian household consist of numerous things: little kids running around, more food than you can bear to look at, and conversation- loud conversation. But have no fear, if you can't speak Farsi, it only takes a few phrases to win the hearts of anyone.

Kheili khoobam: Upon entering you are bombarded with the loving arms of your elders and the same question "Khoob hast?" Unless you want to be stuck in the doorway for the rest of the night, you better know how to at least say this.

What to do with the people you do not recognize but allegedly know: There's always that one person you don't know that says, "Do you remember me? The last time I saw you you must have been four. You are really becoming a grown woman." But of course you can't say "Um sorry, I have no recollection of who you are." So what do you do? –No, silly, you don't call Ghostbusters! You say, "of course I remember you, did you lose weight?"

Sometimes there are people you've actually never met before, and when they are forming their first impressions about you, it doesn't hurt to say, "kheili khoshgeli," regardless of their gender.

And when you are eating those four-course meals your grandmother slaved over you better say, "gaza khoobe."

If the party is a total drag you can discretely beg your mother to "barem."

 Warning: In the event you put on a few pounds since last seeing the people there, you might want to do some last minute crunches because I can guarantee someone will say behind your back "chagh shodeh."




There are family members i don't even know their names

by mannya2001 on

I even had more than one hour conversations with them and didn't know their names. why? they would ask at the beginning if I remembered their names, and i would answer yes, ofcourse. then i would start a topic and get them engaged to distract them.

worse is when the lady relatives ask you if you remember them and you say yes then you attirubte to them someone other than their husband.  eg," do you remember me?" ," yes, you are hamid's wife (you really don't know the lady's name though", then she giggles and says," no I am Hooman's wife"  and your color turn red.

Things to always remember in family gatherings (persian):

Life long impressions are made about you in the course of the 3 hour family gathering that you have every 4 years or so.  Thereofre try to :

1. Speak Farsi if you can

2. Don't be "poro"-

3. Don't think about resting, especially if you are a girl.  Always offer to clean, help in the kitchen- help the host...


Sahar it is good to know what you guys say behind our backs!

by Anonymouse on

Everything is sacred.

Anahid Hojjati

Dear Sahar94, thanks for writing and enjoy the family gathering

by Anahid Hojjati on


Dear Sahar94, try to use these family gatherings to improve your Farsi and find those close to your own age to hang out with. Also if you tell an Iranian guy that "he is khoshgel", he will not appreciate it.  It will be better to say: "what a nice tie", that is if they have a tie :).



by faryarm on

Thanks for the "education..."