Please everyone, buy lots of lingerie.

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Please everyone, buy lots of lingerie.
by Ari Siletz
06-Jan-2011
 

Please everyone, buy lots of lingerie. It’s the best way to get these eternal and omnipresent Army ads off the site…forever. When advertisers realize IC is a prime venue for lingerie sales, our site will be flooded with fantastic Victoria’s Secret bad hejabi action. Seriously, the number of reads on hot chic articles and sex fantasy blogs--both male and female-- show this to be our marketing demographic. Few people here are into wearing camouflaged helmets and carrying M16s. And few here want to go to Iranian villages and shoot wedding guests in the middle of their ishallah mobarak bada. And certainly few like watching soldiers march to the left and right of the screen while Ms. Shahvat Ghamishi is doing her dance thing. And no Mr. US Army, none of us here are Farsi speakers. What we speak is Farglish, an entirely different language family.

Even Soldier of Fortune Magazine isn’t so besieged by the US Army. Their ads are paid for by undocumented Mexican hunters and Civil War re-enactors. We don’t see wolf trap ads in Sierra Club Magazine, suntan lotion ads in Sky and Telescope, or as many Army ads in Soldier of Fortune because people who buy those magazines select themselves for specific products, like hiking boots, telescopes, and heat vision goggles for spotting Mexicans seeking employment after dark. So how come the biggest and most persistent ads on IC are as off target as US missile attacks on Afghan civilians?

Can’t be helped! IC needs the cash. Shahvat khanoum wouldn’t come here without the US Army contributing to her stay. So even if these particular Army ads go away for a while we may need the Pentagon budget again. Which is why we should make sure next time there’s absolutely no more adspace on the screen because all the ad earnings are rightfully coming from Victoria’s Secret.

If it were in lingerie, I wouldn’t even mind seeing a few gun belt and interrogation themes.

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more from Ari Siletz
 
Escape

Ari

by Escape on

Good armies invaded Germany.They rained Death on it.They didn't sit and wait at their border for them get Death rained on.

'Killing families' & 'Wiping out villages' is not the standard as you imply.I have no doubt you don't have a clue to what is going on over there because you fear "US Propaganda".I however refuse to become ignorant of the situation because of the popular demand of it.//www.youtube.com/watch?v=xjnMXZLNzCg 

I like to know what is going on over there so I can speak of it.That's why I have been watching Memri-Army Blogs-Nato Blogs.I've read Iraqi blogs for the last half of decade at least.The 'Frontline' in Afghanistan is basically soldier's getting ambushed and then fighting back.They take one area at a time,bring humanitarian efforts to villages,clear out roadside bombs and provide security.

I believe at least 120,000 Afghan's have signed up to do the job as well.I think it's actually 20,000 more but I am not positive of the number.If they had signed up to do it without the US having to invade,sure we all would have greatly appreciated sparing us the loss of life and economic strain.

The country was under Taliban rule and refused to give up Osama.It's not my fault the Taliban didn't have their sh&t together and are a bunch of barbarian's and it's not the people's fault either they were captive,some willingly and some not of the Taliban.

I'm sorry if you feel the Taliban should have been left alone to continue harboring Osama Bin Laden and training camps.You would have felt less guilty about wearing your lingerie knowing terrorist's are training in Afghanistan to blow you to bits.


oktaby

Dear Ari,

by oktaby on

I really expected a more thorough analysis from you :)

You glaringly missed the main target of Army ads. Average garden variety IC reader with characteristics you listed is not the target, but islamist and/or confused who frequent this site based on 80/20 rule. That is paid vs. plain confused or shariati-ized. The afforementioned 80% is indeed prime recruiting ground for anyone willing to pay sare borj, ranging from prostitution, murder for hire, assasinations and rapes to Persian translation.

I leave it in your capable hands to guestimate what that is of total IC readers and whether Army has/will fill its recruiting quota from these ads $$

Oktaby


bushtheliberator

Very nice looking woman, but

by bushtheliberator on

I doubt if she could remove the tyrant, Saddam Hussein, and stand up a democratic republic in Iraq while wearing that outfit.Before Iranians  can escape the IRI's tyranny somebody ( but surely not you ) will need to strap some weapons,and body armor over their silk thong.

Go Army !


Ari Siletz

Just for you Escape

by Ari Siletz on

Dear Army, I am grateful to you for my freedom to wear lingerie--a freedom I should one day exercise for the hell of it. But please do not rain death upon populations wherever you go for the sake of my lingerie rights. You have seen how in the Khartoum public flogging video (kindly provided by Escape) the poor woman suffers. Please note that Escape's video strongly makes the point that causing people to suffer is wrong. To spell it out, killing families and wiping out villages is not what good armies do. In fact good armies do not invade other countries at all; they protect the lingerie rights of their citizens by defending their own borders against lingerie averse invaders. 

******************* 

Dirty Angel, what commando puns?


Faramarz

Angeline

by Faramarz on

Please do not stuff your under garment with anything!

You look fine just the way you are! You go girl!


Dirty Angel

P.S.

by Dirty Angel on

 
Has anyone used the obvious commando puns yet?

"Stuff happens and some, one way or another, get stuffed"


Escape

If you had the decency to be grateful

by Escape on

  You would give thanks to the Army for the Freedom to wear lingerie

Footage of Woman Receiving Lashing at Khartoum Police Station; Khartoum Governor Justifies Punishment. Warning: Extremely Graphic Images
//www.memritv.org/clip/en/0/0/0/0/0/0/2722.htm

Perhaps you have been gone TOOO long..


Dirty Angel

for me

by Dirty Angel on

plain, off-white thermals, please, thanks in advance.*

"Stuff happens and some, one way or another, get stuffed"

*Yes, do feel free to stuff them wish cash.


P_T_B_A

will buy 2

by P_T_B_A on

Okay Ari, I am going to buy two lingeries: one for my girlfiriend and one for my wife! 


Anahid Hojjati

Thanks MM for useful info.

by Anahid Hojjati on

If JJ confirms what you wrote about ads, then we will click more.


MM

How do Google ads work?

by MM on

Now - It is up to JJJ to confirm the process of clicking / buying thru Google!

PS, I noticed that, as described below, the square ads in IC have one ad in it and the rectangular ones have several-faced flashing ads. 

 

--------------------------------

 

How to Use Google AdSense on a Website (Using Google Advertising to Monetize a Site or Blog)

 

//www.suite101.com/content/how-to-use-google-adsense-on-a-website-a182343

Google is one of the best known websites in the world, and it makes most of the more than $17 billion it brings in every year  ......

Placing Google AdSense on a Website

AdSGoogle advertising blocks are square or rectangular in shape and can have a colored border or no border. A square ad block will have just one ad on it. A rectangular blog usually has between two and four ads. The background and text colors can be chosen in order to blend in with a webpage or to contrast with it to make it more apparent to readers. ....

Each Google AdWords advertiser offers Google a specific price for each click of their ad. When AdSense ads are placed on a webpage, the owner of the Google account receives a percentage of that amount for each click. The specific percentage has not been revealed. Google does not tell AdSense account owners which of the ads were clicked and does not tell Google AdWords advertisers which sites their clicks come from. Different prices are paid for each Google ad word, making the choice of each Google ad word important to the AdSense revenue of the site.


Anahid Hojjati

Please write some christian books

by Anahid Hojjati on

After reading Ari's blog, I got curious about what kind of ads are next to my blogs. I was sleepy and had to go back to sleep so I only checked couple of my blogs. In one case, when I checked my blog about Forough, the ad at the bottom was about writing Christian books. Another ad was for a health insurance plan. Yet another one for Zoosk. Somehow I remember months ago, it seemed that at least sometimes, the ads next to my poems had something to do with subject of the poem, or maybe it was just accidental. Right now, this does not seem to be the case. So if JJ is reading this blog, he can confirm this.


Esfand Aashena

MM JJJ has to be the one telling us if that is true.

by Esfand Aashena on

I've "heard" the same rumor but is it true?  I think it is more like a bulk payment where whoever is sponsoring the ad, say Google, pays something like $100/day to i.com to post whatever ad they want.

Now if each click is $0.25/click then JJJ needs to tell us it is true and I'm sure there will be lots of clicks if it's true.

We have enough rumors already! 

Everything is sacred


MM

whatever d ad, please click on ALL of them, & buy thru them

by MM on

Someone told me that evey time the ads on IC-site are clicked, it is a source of revenue for IC.  Now, if you buy thru the ads: even a better source of income for IC.

PS, is that Dina's picture?


Esfand Aashena

Ari jaan there needs 2 be an application process 2 buy lingerie!

by Esfand Aashena on

The lingerie shown in this picture would not necessarily look similar for everyone!  There needs to be an application process with at least a pass/fail criteria!

Everything is sacred


Bavafa

Great blog Ari, point well put

by Bavafa on

Though my fear is that US Army may start putting up ads that if you join and help us bomb Iran, we may just deliver you one of those in the lingerie.

Mehrdad


Sargord Pirouz

At first, the Army ads

by Sargord Pirouz on

At first, the Army ads didn't bother me. But being subjected to the same ones now, over and over again, I'm pretty sick of it. 


Anahid Hojjati

Thanks Ari jan. Also geeks, connect to other geeks

by Anahid Hojjati on

Ari jan, thanks for your blog. Along the same line as your blog, more geeks should use the ads on IC and connect to other geeks. I saw the ad for Geek to Geek on IC. Now that IranianPersonals is our major investor, I don't know if Geek to Geek is still ok or not.