Waterfront Persians suck

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Shorts
by Shorts
22-Jun-2008
 

From Stuff black people hate

The Georgetown Waterfront is one of the only places in [Washington] DC that doesn’t suck anymore. From March - October, you can hobble your angry ass down to Georgetown Waterfront Park and enjoy drinks outdoors by the water, grab insanely expensive food (with insanely-er bad service) from Sequoia restaurant, and watch scantily clad women walk between M Street and the water while pretending to be indignant about the negative sexual attention they draw to themselves.

Unfortunately, there is one thing about the waterfront that sucks: Persians.

The favorite pastime of the sons of rich Persian oil and IT barons is to get a bunch of their greasy Ferrari-jacket-wearing douchebag friends together, hop on a Sea Ray, and park that motherfucker on the improvised dock in front of the harbor. I’ve included a diagram below to point out the interesting sights you’ll see there:

Figure 1: Click on the image to zoom in

When you park your boat at the dock, you’re within sight of the many women sitting around the bars and restaurants looking for dudes on boats to fuck, but you’re not close enough for them to distinguish your youthful awesomeness from the 50+ year old rich white dudes who’ve also parked their Sea Rays and are gallivanting about in the company of their Stepford wives, Abercrombie sons, and golden fucking retrievers.

So what’s the prospective Persian suitor to do? Blast god awful techno music, of course! Somehow, these sandbags* have convinced themselves that a perpetually alternating woofer-thump and stochattic cymbal is precisely what makes the pussy go “ooh whee.” After all, if it works in porno, it must work in real life. Techno music is so effective at attracting women, in fact, that you never see any women on a Persian boat. This is because their reaction to the electronica, combined with the pungent stank of the Persians’ Sex Panther cologne, has caused all women in the area to orgasm so hard that they literally disappear into thin air>>>FULL TEXT

 

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Zion

Shocked

by Zion on

I am rather shocked at reading so much racist remarks in that website. I am more shocked that you all take it so easily and even approve of it.
It seems only Zionist enrage you, but I really fail to see why after seeing this. I am not being sarcastic, I am dead serious. What have Zionists, Jews or Israelis ever done to your people to be singled out like this, Israelis and Jews have really no bad feeling about Iranian people. Believe me. The regime in Iran is one thing, but the Iranian population hve never been vilified in Israel .
Why are Israelis singled out, when you don't seem to be bothered even by such vile attacks as in the comment section of this website?


Cy of Persia

Here is my reply to the post

by Cy of Persia on

The above article has attracted 168 comments in "stuff black people hate" site."   This was my reply to all the unpleasant and racist remarks that black people had posted there.

It hurts me to no end to witness the young black people who are supposed to be the guardians of Dr. Luther King's dream chanting hate instead of universal love.  

Remember every nationality and race has its own unique culture.How would you like a funny blog written by a Persian calling you niggers, coons, eight balls, Ace of spades, Little sambos while displaying pictures and charts which shows pimps with Afro or artificially pressed hair, low riders, Rap gangsters, feisty fat black women on welfare, teenage mothers of 4 kids from different absent fathers living in projects and Mr. Short himself sitting by the Potomac river eating water melon and fried chicken wishing that he had a boat?Wouldn't that be a kick?  Do you think that would be something that a blog called; "Things Persian people hate" would print?   NO, because we don't hate anybody.When it comes to race, we are a color blind nation. 

The founder of Persian Empire, Cyrus the great  wrote the first declaration of human rights on a clay cylinder 25 centuries ago.   He taught us to respect all people, all nations and all religions no matter how different from ours it would be.  

Our Emperor Darius the great despite being in charge of 28 different nations in his empire stretching from North Africa to India did not have any slaves.  He paid people to build his palace of Persepolis.  

We are peace loving people.  We practically invented the divine love.Read poems of our poets Rumi, Hafiz and Omar Khayyam, if you get a chance.Our culture may seem strange to you because we are still relatively new immigrants.  Every immigrant group has had the same type of issues.  Italians, Irish, Polish etc.   If you feel jealous because you think these people's money comes from the oil and $5 a gallon that you pay for gas at the pump, think again.Persians have the highest number of educated people with highest paying jobs of any immigrant group in this country.   We earn every penny by working in the most critical jobs of this nation.  Try to get to know us and we will grow on you in no time.  I promise you.  May peace and love be with you all.


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Ebi (incidently that's my

by skatermom (not verified) on

Ebi (incidently that's my father's name). Thanks for the clarification. The banks of the Potomic river! I don't know what's worst, Shorts' diatribe on the "Iranian dude" or actually being territorial about the Potomic river. One foot in that water and I'm sure your genetic makeup would be altered for good.


ebi amirhosseini

Re : skatermom

by ebi amirhosseini on

No beaches in DC,it is the banks(waterfront) of Potomac river!!


Parham

This is a MUST read!

by Parham on

I recommend everyone click on the link and also read all the replies to the blog post underneath... :-)


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Oh my god that was funny.

by skatermom (not verified) on

Oh my god that was funny. Washington DC has beaches. I've never been to DC and nor do I ever want to go. It's much the same in my little beach town here in Southern California. Instead of Persians we have the huge influx of OC, LA and inland empire dudes. Mostly white guys in lifted trucks or bmw's with tons of stickers covering there cars. None of these guys surf. They all listen to crap techno and or hip hop. I think this story resonates to most locals who live in a tourism based community. This guy nailed it with Persian guy stereotypes. Unfortunately I haven't met too many Persian guys who didnt fit this bill. I wish I would and could prove him wrong.


ebi amirhosseini

Dear Shorts !!

by ebi amirhosseini on

Well said! ,I guess if one is not residing in DC area,maynot grasp what you're really trying to say !. Well,last time my wife & I were there,was.......I can't remember!!.

best wishes