Random thoughts of a confused forigner


Random thoughts of a confused forigner
by The Prince

I came to the U.S at the age of seventeen by myself from Iran. Before I get to this country, like most of us Iranians, I went through the usual pain and agony emitting from our glorious uprising against tyranny and replacing it with the “DowlateMehr”. Not to mention when this all happened I was only 12. Nevertheless like everyone else, I too, paid the price, suffering from personal losses in my family to being a refugee all over the world!

After arriving to the U.S., I started community college with a goal to go to film school and earn my bachelor’s degree. I have to say that filmmaking was my first passion. But I had to learn English first!

Right before I started film school, I decided to start on the right foot. Marrying a nice Iranian girl who had absolutely nothing in common with me sounded like a great recipe for success!

She is a successful physician now married to someone else!

In my first year in film school, I wrote and directed my first feature film and managed to screen it in a couple of theatres in LA. Not bad for a first year film student with no connections or resources. I believe if you type in my name in www.hollywood.com or www.imdb.com it will pop up!

I was on my way up the ladder towards fame and fortune!

Once the film flopped and I graduated, I started my own production company. Us Iranians need to be our own boss! Did little projects here and there such as short clips and music videos. I then produced a Documentary/How to video called “How to break into acting”. It was a good project and a very helpful tool for many starting actors. It is a shame that no one got to see it.

Trying to make ends meet while my company was on its first leg, I had to wear many different hats. I was a wedding videographer, a production assistant in several projects including a game show called “Supermarket Sweep”. Anybody remembers? I was a waiter, a tape operator, a tape vault person, a limo driver, a delivery messenger, a failed shuttle company owner, and ….. You name it, and I did it.

It took some time, plus my wife’s constant “loving”persuasion, to make me realize that I was going nowhere!

So I decided to go to law school and become an attorney! I am an Iranian man after all and I need prestige!

This is when my wife decided to leave me. She was in her second year of medical school and has had enough of me by then. As if, that is ever possible! She told me that while I was pursuing my film career I at least had a dream. Now I was dreamless. She just couldn’t handle that. She also was kind enough to let me know that she was a very sexual person and pretty much any man could raise her interest. She just didn’t want to have sex with me! This was a necessary and uplifting piece of information which every man should hear, at least once in their lifetime! I later learned in law school that this is called the Emasculation Clause in divorce proceedings!! It comes right before the Castration Clause!

My current wife is nicer though. She only wants me to commit suicide or die.

The first year of Law School was great. I felt free and hopeful. I was doing good in school and I was living a true college student’s life on student loan! I was having the time of my life! I was even nicknamed the Eye-Raynian Stallion by my friends at the time! Things were on their wayup!!

I had also started working as a legal assistant in a law firm in Newport Beach. This is where I met a beautiful sexy and spunky secretary. Before I knew it, she was pregnant and I had dropped out of law school!

The Stallion had worked its magic!

I was now a proud father and a proud owner of a limousine company in Orange County. I also had two other partners in this venture. It is not too long before we came up with the brilliant idea of buying a failed rental car company, turn it around and grow big. I was working really hard for long hours and with almost no pay. This put yet another added pressure on my already fragile family life.

I was certain however, that this time, through my hard work, dedication and sacrifice, I would be successful. My hard work will pay off and everything will be alright.

So, I was back in school again to get my paralegal certificate, while going through lawsuits and bankruptcy. The entrepreneurial lion inside me however, did not sleep and was still roaring.

This is when I met Pamela, who brought me to the wonderful world of hard money loan. I met her in the law firm where I had just found a job at as a paralegal. She was one of their clients. She was a great teacher who showed me the ropes and taught me how to make money using my own personal savings and that of my family and dear friends. She was the female Bernie Madoff even before there was a Madoff, and I was her pupil. She was a true pioneer!

I was now married for the second time and had a family. Money was great and I even managed to take my family on a month long European tour. Pamela was as honest as they come! All the deals were legit. That little sweet old mafia lady who lived in Vegas and had a vault full of money in Holland, was just an innocent widow with no one to help her. Or Gene, the guy who had us sit and wait for two months waiting for this millions of dollars wire transfer to arrive from, of all places, Nigeria, had to be an honorable, hundred percent upstanding, law abiding gentleman.

This time for sure I had made it! Not only that, but all my family and friends will be rich too and will be thankful and proud of me.

After Pamela vanished and my friends and family shunned me, we moved to Vegas.

There is nothing that a little nervous breakdown cannot cure and Las Vegas is the place to be!

Few years passed and I started working in Corporate America. I had learnt my lesson but not given up yet! I couldn’t and didn’t want to tame the lion.

During these years I dabbled in more adventures and failed. Call it stubbornness or perhaps sheer stupidity. Whatever it was, I knew that I would finally make it. Or so I thought.

While I was trying to move up the corporate ladder and falling off of it through constant layoffs, I worked on different projects domestic and international. I tried to fund multi million dollars hydro-electric projects in South America. I traveled the world and throughout the United States. I was even in the Presidential Palace in Ecuador meeting with president Lucio Gutierrez, for one of these projects.

My most recent failed adventure was importing natural stone, fashion jewelry from India! Heck, I even tried my luck at poker. Even though I am a very good player, I never seem to be able to win!!

I recently worked as an Associate Producer in an independent film. The film is due for release on November of 2010. We already have over 2100 fans on our facebook page. No money yet. I just did it for the love of the arts.

However, between you and me, I cannot help feeling a bit eerie about the success of this film or lack thereof, since I had a hand in it! Well, can you blame me?

Today I am on top of the world! I am penniless and up to my eyeballs in debt. I am jobless, careless and homeless!! I am suffering from diabetes and recently found out that I have cataracts in one of my eyes, at 44!! Can you believe this?

Despite all of these, I am still standing and I am still hopeful. I figure if I am to go down, I will be going down kicking and screaming.

I am smart, likable and have a great personality. I am a compassionate individual and thrive on helping others. I am creative and full of great ideas. I just cannot seem to get it right! It seems like whatever I touch, turns into crap!! Will things ever turn around?

Perhaps not! Perhaps it is true that the only purpose of my life is to serve as warning for others!

Because I tell you, turning me into a success is a monumental task. It would be like rediscovering Penicillin!


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more from The Prince
Bitter Divorced Man

Don't you ever give up, because you are very funny

by Bitter Divorced Man on


recommend extreme self care

by gunjeshk on

stop trying to compensate for what you lost

stop trying to get rich overnight

stop thinking with your small head


dude, you need extreme self care

never give up!


Been thinking about this blog since yesterday

by Rea on

Midlife crisis or fiction?

Either way, you are not alone.

We are numerous. And gaining in numbers. ;o)



I enjoyed reading your story

by jasonrobardas on

   The problem  is  you are not focused on one plan .   You leave everything unfinished  or done half way .There is drama in eveyone's life . You described yours very well .



by tissa on

Okay, this is hilarious.  I always had crazy things happening to me too, and I finally found an outlet for it -- stand-up comedy.  You should give it a try.  :)

13th Legion

Dear Prince..

by 13th Legion on

I don’t think most of us took your blog as if you were whinnying,You told us a real human story and we gave you a true human response ;))

All the wonderful heartfelt response is a sure sign that you’re writing has the power and effect to move people ;) that’s more food for thought.

Most importantly, @ 44 its way to early to want to hold up a red flag! You can do that when you are 60, your story has not come to an end yet, so how do you know where, when and how your path will end???

Keep on keeping on ; you are not alone in walking this path.


The Prince

Thanks everyone

by The Prince on

For all your support and advice. It overwhelms me! Something triggered in me to write this and I just wrote it, sort of, yek nafas!!! My intention was not at all to whine!! If anything, I just wanted to hold a red flag, in case anyone was crazy enough to want follow this path!!!!  

bajenaghe naghi

Prince jan

by bajenaghe naghi on

I am in awe of you! You are one of the most successful (in making) people I have ever been this close to (even though the closeness is that both are on IC.)

You are a very accomplished man. You know so much about so many things.  In your short life you have done so many jobs that takes twenty men do in their entire lives.  Let the fire burn and do not stop. But I have one advice. Concentrate on your passion. Funnel all your energy to achieve it and never stop dreaming. 

To me, my friend, you are a success and I know we will soon see your name in Panvision-Technicolor-3-D! 



Great read

by benross on



Dear Prince: You would be

by vildemose on

Dear Prince: You would be surprised how many millions are out there feeling like. Read this and the comments:


13th Legion

Greetings Great Prince....

by 13th Legion on

From reading your blog, I think you are a very gifted writer and have a natural talent for telling a dramatic story with a hint of humor and realism and by reading your story I can see and feel that you are a fighter and a dreamer, and that’s a very potent combination!

I don’t know if you have thought about it, but it may be food for thought to try your hand at writing if you haven’t already! With today’s many on-line resources it is easier than ever to write a story, a book a film scripts and get published, and as you know many books have turned into block buster movies, the beauty also in the low over head: a creative mind and a lap top computer.

We come from a rich eastern culture that has many old stories and fairy tales and myths that could be re written for a western and international audience.

I wonder why writers don’t use any of this material.

Food for thought dear friend ;)

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.  Oscar Wilde

I to, and perhaps all of us have had our trials and battles in life and will continue to do so, for this is the story of life on earth ;)

Whenever I get down on the world and its ruthless ways and treatment I remember a few favorite lines from the last Rocky movie to lift me spirits up a bit:

 The world aint all sunshine and rainbows, it’s a very mean and nasty place,And I don’t care how though you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it! You, me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life, but aint about how hard you hit, it’s about how hard can you get hit and keep moving forward, how much can you take and keep moving forward,

That’s how wining is done, now if you know what your worth go out and get what your worth, but you’ve got to be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying your aint were you want to be because of him or her or anybody, cowards do that and THAT AINT YOU, YOUR BETTER THAN THAT….

Cheers and in hope of better days for us all.



You are already a success.

by vildemose on

You are already a success. The true measure of success is what you've been able to overcome in your life; including all your demons. If there is a single defining trait to your life it is that you get up when you’ve been knocked down. It is time to brush yourself off and get going, that boulder won’t roll itself.


This is what Kabbalah has to say about success:

Most of us measure our success and failures against our outer achievements and those of other people. In fact this is futile because the true extent of success is deeply personal and in this area no two people are alike. However to be truly cognizant of this one must be connected on an inner level. This involves peeling away all the externalities, all the barriers that we build around ourselves and seeing ourselves for what we really are—a complete individual with no need for outside recognition to make us whole. The external measurements of success are seen as irrelevant and negative thoughts and the fear of failure become subverted. Once a person feels secure in his or her own skin, failure is no longer a major threat and they are left unencumbered to think and feel totally positive. A person who sees themselves and the universe on this soul level becomes relaxed with their place in life. The external measurements of success are seen as irrelevant and negative thoughts and the fear of failure become subverted. Once a person feels secure in his or her own skin, failure is no longer a major threat and they are left unencumbered to think and feel totally positive.

The benefits of this strategy are thus twofold. First life becomes more relaxed and second, the more positive and optimistic outlook actually attracts the good things the person really wants from life.

Ancient wisdom is constantly being repackaged and sold to contemporary audiences in different ways. The despite the odds success of this self-published book tells us that real wisdom is timeless and always relevant. It is a shame that more people don’t look for it where it is found in its most pristine state - in the Torah and its mystical teachings.

From: //www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3371656,00.html


Can't wait for your next one...

by comrade on

The title, in my opinion, should be changed to:

"Systematic Thoughts Of A Typical Persian"

"Learning carries within itself certain dangers because out of necessity one has to learn from one's enemies."



Hard to believe!

by Doctor X on

You went through all this and now you have ended up with a major illness...(hope you will get your needed treatement somehow) yet all throuough you managed to make all the wrong turns and wound up here where you are now...

It is either that or you are just a great writer who can make anyone believe anything. Try getting a job with SNL. They are always looking for creative writers.


The Prince

Thanks Nilou!

by The Prince on

Happy to be able to put a smile on your face! 

Niloufar Parsi

don't mean to be insensitive

by Niloufar Parsi on

but somehow this was great fun to read!

great style :)


Jahanshah Javid

Good luck

by Jahanshah Javid on

Never give up. Your adventurous life could be your next film, or book :)

Never ever give up.

Drop a hint about the upcoming film. Would love to see it.