Azita Shafazand
"I wanna put on an ironed shirt"
I wanna be Shafazand at her best
I wanna look my best,
when I meet the President
I’ll take a free trip as his guest
“I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad”
I wanna put on an ironed shirt
I wanna look my best
I wanna talk like the rest
I’ll open a beauty salon
In every town
In every city in Iran
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
I’m ganna drive the latest Mercedes Benz,
with a license plate that says:
AZITA#1
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
I wanna be on the cover of Fars News Agency
Sipping tea with Mahmoud and Mashaei
I wanna say Islam discovered gravity
Mahmoud had a halo on top of his head
Get brownie points in between
I wanna eat kebab half a meter long
Keep eating till I blow my thong
I wanna be on Islamic TV
Talk about my school of beauty
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
“Oh, every time I close my eyes”
I wanna find a way,
to remove unwanted hair without pain
That’s what I’m researching in my lab
Move over waxing,
tweezing and band
Here comes Azita Shafazand
I’ll do it in a humane way
It's everyone’s human right,
to live a hairless life
Smooth as baby's butt
I’ll do it without a cut
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
Give me your hairy Faati komandos
Give me your wooly mullahs
Your bearded man
Give me your whiskered zan
I’ll do what I can
Forget Brazilian Wax,
Vajebi, lazer, razer blade
Here comes Azita the Great
I'll epilate your pileous hair
I’ll epilate them for Cyrus the Great
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
I’ll figure it out in my lab
Forget nasty Nair
I’ll thread your unwanted hair
I’ll discuss it on the air
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
Give me my best ironed shirt
I wanna look the best,
when I meet the President
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Loved it
by divaneh on Sun Sep 05, 2010 03:20 PM PDTAnother excellent example of your talent MPD Jaan. This is awesome.
Move over waxing,
tweezing and band
Here comes Azita Shafazand
ps. Don't you think she looks like puppets in that photo? You just expect her to bounce up and down instead of walking.
good job MPD
by Masoud Kazemzadeh on Sun Sep 05, 2010 01:14 AM PDTMPD jaan,
That was hilarious. You did a fantastic job with the poems.
MK
Thank you and No thank you . . .
by Javadagha on Sat Sep 04, 2010 10:05 PM PDTMPD jaan;
Thanks for the picture of Azita in the conference. She is walking like a sheer-e-zan. This picture says a lot about her.
No thank you for your bull-shit. What a NONE sense!!! You are using words such as Fucking?! and this website is permitting these none-senses to be printed?
You and others such as Fred and Co. are taking Iranian.com down with you.
Ghashghash! (another one Azarin:)
by Monda on Sat Sep 04, 2010 06:09 PM PDTZendeh baad MPD!
Dear MPD
by M. Saadat Noury on Sat Sep 04, 2010 11:33 AM PDTThanks for sharing. You are a talented person. Some days you should reveal your real name and edit all pieces of your beautiful blog by your true identity. Your stunning poems will shine more for sure.
What a fantastic tribute.....
by Gharib on Sat Sep 04, 2010 10:03 AM PDT... to the one who thinks she has "arrived"....
Very smart!
by Souri on Sat Sep 04, 2010 08:53 AM PDTIntelligent and well thought!!!
I truly enjoyed your poem, dear MPD. You are a brillant artist!
Simply brilliant!
by Hoshang Targol on Sat Sep 04, 2010 07:20 AM PDTDark hints of Janis Joblin.
"Forget Brazilian Wax,
Vajebi, lazer, razer blade
Here comes Azita the Great
I'll epilate your pileous hair
I’ll epilate them for Cyrus the Great"
Made my day!
This is my last "Lol"...I promise!
by Azarin Sadegh on Sat Sep 04, 2010 12:48 AM PDTToday is such a strange day! I can't stop writing anything other than haha or lol...and it feels so NOT me!(haha)...but I can't come up with intelligent-sounding "haha" or "LOL"...
I love your poem, dear MPD! You are so talented...bravo!
Dear MPD, this is very smart satire, thanks
by Anahid Hojjati on Fri Sep 03, 2010 11:58 PM PDTDear MPD, thanks for such a great satirical poem. You made me laugh. This poem is about all those pro IRI people who just want to be pro IRI so they have to come up with manufactured reasons for their support of IRI. I liked all of your poem but my favorite part is the following:
I wanna be on the cover of Fars News Agency
Sipping tea with Mahmoud and Mashaei
I wanna say Islam discovered gravity
Mahmoud had a halo on top of his head
Get brownie points in between
I wanna eat kebab half a meter long
Keep eating till I blow my thong
.....
by yolanda on Sat Sep 04, 2010 10:09 PM PDTHi! MPD,
Thank you for your hilarious parody of the super popular "Billionaire" song! You got to find someone (Maz Jobrani or youself....) to sing and record this buffoonish version of the "Billionaire" song......it may become a hit song on you-tube or Persian TV!
Thank you for your contribution to IC and thank you for your ingenuity!
take care!
آزیتا شفازند در مصاحبه با خبرگزاری فارس (فالس نیوز):
Shifteh AnsariFri Sep 03, 2010 10:33 PM PDT
//www.farsnews.com/newstext.php?nn=8905270813
"خبرگزاري فارس: شفازند با اشاره به نامه گروه متبوعش به سران كاخ سفيد و هشدار نسبت به هرگونه حمله احتمالي به ايران، گفت: به مسئولان آمريكايي تاكيد كردهايم كه ايران، عراق و افغانستان نيست و هرگونه رفتار تهاجمي اتحاد ملت ايران را منسجمتر ميكند.
آزيتا شفازند مهندس راه و ساختمان، ايراني مقيم آمريكا و از جمله مدعوين همايش ايرانيان مقيم خارج از كشور بود، در گفتوگو با خبرنگار سياسي خبرگزاري فارس، با بيان اينكه عملكرد منفي آمريكا مانع از ارتباط ايران با اين كشور شده است، اظهار داشت: اگر آمريكا ميخواهد با ايران ارتباط داشته باشد ابتدا بايد به آرمانهاي مردم اين كشور احترام بگذارد و سپس با ادبيات ملت ايران با مسئولان جمهوري اسلامي سخن بگويد.
...
"...
Azita Shafazand
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Fri Sep 03, 2010 10:25 PM PDTIslam Discovered Gravity
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Fri Sep 03, 2010 10:17 PM PDT//iranian.com/main/blog/soosan-khanoom/god-did-not-create-universe-says-who
I Chase the Devil, put on an iron shirt
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Fri Sep 03, 2010 10:14 PM PDT“I wanna be a billionaire so fricking bad”
by Multiple Personality Disorder on Fri Sep 03, 2010 10:02 PM PDT