Thank you but get your own Valentine!

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Monda
by Monda
14-Feb-2009
 

Back in January of '78 when I landed in the girls' dorms in Florida, I was clueless about many things. The English that I thought I had learned in Iran, which made my parents proud, was at best minimal in real life, especially at our campus dormitory. I could not always find the meanings in my portable dictionary, especially when they said it in a variety of accents.

It was one night in February, I noticed the unusual energy, even for a Saturyday night, among my suitemates. I could not for the life of me figure out why they are all dressed in pink or red. Or why the wall phones were constantly ringing their obnoxious rings. In my painful shyness I approached my roommate Susan Johnston, who began the semester by telling me she had no idea why I was sharing her room, "Excuse me Susan, what is going on tonight?" She put her mascara down and stared at me for a moment then offered "Don't you have Valentine's Day where you come from?". What Day?! No we don't have it, not bothering her with my stupidity.

While I was cruising the hallways looking for a friendly face I could ask the same question, I ran into Michael, a goodlooking blond boy who was in my Macro Econ class. He smiled and asked me what I was doing? I said I was going later on to the campus movie theatre. He asked me what they were showing. I had no idea. I liked the campus cinema because it was dark and no one could see me looking in my dictionary while I bent down under my backrow seat, with my little flashlight. 

Michael asked me if I had a Valentine. Who is that again? I did not tell him that I was on my way trying to find out where or what Valentine was. But instinctually by hearing the giggles and tones, I had figured it had something to do with naughtiness and sex. Where I came from, we did not talk about those topics publically. End of discussion. Of course unless we were sluts.

Perhaps Michael noticed when I felt hot in my face. He then said "Do you want me to be your Valentine?" I was speechless! My head was spinning. I felt totally confused. So after a long pause I answered: "Thank you Michael, get your own Valentine". What?! What did that mean even? I was sweating profusely when he reached to kiss me on my cheek, after he cracked up at my response. I was no longer oriented to place or time. In that weird dimension, my eyes followed him in the hallway toward a door. He knocked on that door and when the girl shouted at the sight of the red thing he took out of his pocket, I was still confused.

That night I thought and thought. Somehow, I related Valentine to a cortisan-type symbol. I had all the evidence too. The girls in their short tight red outfits, high heels, exaggerated makeups and hairdos. Yes they were all over my dorm. I did go to the campus cinema and had a great time, as for some reason it was empty. Later on when I came back to my room there was a piece of paper on my bed "Manda Happy Valentine's Day!" in red ink. Signed by SA. I was confused again, I needed to find out who SA was so I could thank her.There was Susan and a Sarah in our suite. And I didn't know Sarah's last name. 

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Ah, the Good Days!

by Lilster (not verified) on

Thanks Monda, for a great article. It took me back to a sweeter and more innocent time, when the future looked brighter and full of promise.
Whatever other venomous voices say, I think your story is wonderful...


Monda

Dear Visiting Writer

by Monda on

I am sitting with your great positive feedback as I leave this reply for you! Thanks for reading me and commenting here.


Monda

Dear Flying Solo

by Monda on

I had not heard of that one either! I will try my darnest to be Mean in order to keep them Keen :o) (who ever they may be!)

Oh my...thanks for your comment on my smile. My hair is actually Preference I think "Ash Medium Brown". After all this attention, you bet I'd write more ;o)


Monda

Monda's piece

by Monda on

Dear Monda once again, after reading your article, you gave me even another reason to be proud of you.

I love it,

is sweet and witty, just like you

Enrico 

   


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To all self-appointed editors:

by visiting writer (not verified) on

Real writers -- and editors in chief, for that matter -- don't copy edit. Uninvited copy editing is for wannabes. And anyway, even the best writers use copy editors for the last, polished version of their MS.

As for your level of savaad I will only say that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. Nor do you know jack about literary criticism.

Ms. Monda, your writing is unassuming and also fresh and sweet. Hard core writers would kill for an illusion of the latter.


Flying Solo

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by Flying Solo on

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Monda

"Keep Them Guessing"

by Monda on

I will certainly pass this one on. I love mysteries!


Monda

JJ

by Monda on

but wait, now i'm thinking that maybe she was not your type or something...could be blessing in disguise that she didn't sign it, nah? just imagine that you knew who it was, approached her and she turned into a serial killer or something...what then? we wouldn't have iraniandotcom.


Flying Solo

.

by Flying Solo on

.

 

 


Midwesty

...

by Midwesty on

Sorry, couldn't resist...

"I would have had her to sign it" maybe?... 


Monda

Dear Flying Solo

by Monda on

Apparently you sweet little girl already has a better grasp of nuances relating to Valentine's Day than I did at age 20! You've taught her well :o)

Thank you for your feedback. I am one of your big fans on this site.


Flying Solo

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by Flying Solo on

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Dear Monda

by XOX (not verified) on

Regrettably, I'm not much of a blogger :(
I just post anonymously from time to time.


Shazde Asdola Mirza

Monda jan: I'd only recommend that she goes to hell more often!

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on

She is the same person who is obsessed with setting us "right" on all the political issues too! A smug full-of-herself attention digger, whom we all know too well, by now. I told her to bite me, here it is again in a language that she can fully understand.

אכל קצר שלי

Monda

Dear AssimilationNation

by Monda on

You are right in that our younger generation does come up with its own versions of all occasions American or Persian. Thank you for your comment.


Monda

Dear Shazde Asadolah Mirza

by Monda on

I am glad that you liked this little piece of my memories! Thank You for reading it. You know what, just ignore the youknowwho's, they eventually and hopefully will get a life. Wouldn't you recommend them though to visit SF more frequently?


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Nazy, XOX & Monda

by AssimilationNation (not verified) on

Isn't it strange that the behaviors that both shocked you and left a life-long negative impression on you when you first encountered dorm life in the US are the very behaviors that a vast majority of the youngsters in the second generation of Iranian-American would consider normal fun on any given weekend at one of their parties. This is the what the word "assimilation" really means.


Shazde Asdola Mirza

Dear Monda: very nicely written and timely piece; thanks.

by Shazde Asdola Mirza on

liTerarei criTicque: bite meee!

S.A.M (an official Khar Vazir)


Monda

Dear XOX

by Monda on

How about starting a blog about college dorm experiences? What do you say?

I remember some of my suitemates drank so much that they passed out on weekend nights. Sometimes their parents would call our suite to check on them and since I was the only one around to answer the one wall phone in our suite, they would ask me to check on their daughters. Can you imagine, I didn't even know the meaning of passing-out! (What was she passing out? To whom?) 

 


Monda

Nazy!

by Monda on

Yes Namjoo was phenomenal as usual! And I'm so excited about the possibility of seeing him again in a few months, with a band! I can only imagine what that would sound like. I can't wait to read your write-up on the event. I so hope you intend to fit that in your busy life, like today?

My cousin and I were driving around for nearly 3 hours to get there, for the interview segment. I have horrible sense of direction plus we were chatting the entire time while I was driving. So many exits were passed last night. We got there around 5:45, found all the auditorium doors shut, so we went to look for an Iranian restaurant to have dinner. That was again around a couple of hours of driving in itself, as the addresses we had were not accurate! Fortunately we did make it before his performance started! So had I driven another 2 hours, we could've been in L.A.! But of course Namjoo wasn't there last night :o)

Too bad I didn't get to see you afterwards. I figured you'd be engaged with the postshow crowd of friends. And I was terribly starving for Persian food.


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Grammar King: I don’t like it. How about this:

by Literary critic (not verified) on

In the early 90s, I lived in a dorm in my college in New York City. One day someone left a note under my door that said, "Seize the moment". I would have if the person who wrote it had signed it.


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dorm life sucked

by XOX (not verified) on

When I first came to America, I experienced culture shock too. The worst place was the dorm for me. I didn't understand the need to drink so much, and do drugs, in order to have a party or enjoy themselves.

I was totally shocked to see students my own age, drink down a 6 pack easily, and wanting to have more too, like another 6 pack may be?! Prior to that, I only thought old, prof. alchoholics did that. I was grossed out. One year living in a dorm, was all I could take.


Nazy Kaviani

So sweet!

by Nazy Kaviani on

Monda, this was so sweet!

My very first Halloween and my very first New year's Eve in the US also had me really spooked with my friends' drunken and unruly behavior. The two occasions remain my least favorite American holidays to this day as a result.

Say, where did you go?!! I so wanted to introduce you to Alahazrat Hajiagha and Bayramali and Leva! Wasn't the concert just out of this world?

Keep on writing sweet Monda! You have stories to tell, I know!


Monda

Dear IRANdokht, CD and JJ

by Monda on

I'm glad you enjoyed this little memory.

IRANdokht jan I had no idea that SA stood for "secret admirer". I never found out who that was, but I was happy just the same! To be honest I was hoping it was from my unfriendly roommate Susan. Thank God she moved back home before the hostage crisis drama started!

CD. please ask your wife to share some of her funny memories with us! You are lucky to have been together for such a long time.

Dear JJ thank you for reading my story. Your jaa was empty tonight at the Namjoo event at Stanford's Pan Asian Music Festival.


Jahanshah Javid

Literary critic & Grammar King

by Jahanshah Javid on

Dear molla noghteheez,

Man beesavaadam. Ghabooleh.

Now let's get back to the subject of the lovely blog.

Mamnoon


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LitCrit

by Grammar King (not verified) on

How about this:

In the early 90s, I lived in my college dorm in New York City. Someone left a note under my door which said, "Seize the moment." I would have if she had signed it. :0)

My only question is how did JJ know that the person who left the note was a she if it was unsigned?


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Better yet:

by Literary critic (not verified) on

In the early 90s, I was living in a college dorm in New York City when one day someone left a note under my door, which said “seize the moment”. I would have, had she signed it.


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The best I can think of:

by Literary critic (not verified) on

“I would have, had she signed it.”

You should be more careful about commas.


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Literary critic

by Grammar King (not verified) on

Dear LC,

People who live in glass houses should not throw stones.

It should read:

In the early 90s, I lived in my college dorm in New York City.

"In the early 90s" is a time phrase which requires the use of a comma between it and the independent clause "I lived in my college in New York City."


Jahanshah Javid

Thanks

by Jahanshah Javid on

Literary critic, thank you for correcting my first mistake. I corrected it. Your second complaint tells me you're just as beesavaad as I am.