Iran's Halal Internet

Efforts underway to isolate Iranians from world wide web

Wired UK: Ali Aghamohammadi, Iran's head of economic affairs, has gone on record saying that the country intends to launch an Islamic "halal" edition of the internet. The plan is to avoid the difficulties of censorship by creating a parallel network that conforms to Islamic principles, with the eventual aim of countering western influence on the country. Aghamohammadi told IRNA, Iran's state-run news agency, that the project would be "aimed at Muslims on a ethical and moral level". "Iran will soon create an internet that conforms to Islamic principles, " he said, "to improve its communication and trade links with the world.">>>

01-Jun-2011
Current Events videos | Photos
Balatarin
Share/Save/Bookmark

 
Cost-of-Progress

No surprise here

by Cost-of-Progress on Thu Jun 02, 2011 06:13 AM PDT

The Alliance of Reesh-o Pashm, the keepers of the sacred "kaaseye daagh tar az aash" doctrine that has afflicted so many non-arabs (in this case Iranians) to embrace Islam is afraid of the power of the Web. Afraid that one day, some day, our people would wake up and smell the feet in the shrine and rid themselves of this cancer.....at least rid themselves of its crushing grip on governance and power, nevermind hearts and......what's that?...oh...Minds?  

CoP

____________

IRAN FIRST

____________


  •  
Anahid Hojjati

Very funny radius of the Persian cat

by Anahid Hojjati on Thu Jun 02, 2011 05:28 AM PDT

Like your points like replacing mouse with the lamb and interrupting for the prayers.


  •  
radius-of-the-persian-cat

Halal Cloud Computing

by radius-of-the-persian-cat on Thu Jun 02, 2011 04:58 AM PDT

1.) Every computer will work only if its screen is turned eastward, therefore facing Mekka.

2.)  The internet data transmission will be interrupted 5 times a day precisely as determined by the Ajatollah Chamenei to allow everybody to attend the prayer.

3.)  Computer mouse will be replaced by a computer lamb, since the first is not mentioned in the Quran as a halal creature.

4.)  Before switching on, computer plugs have to be washed thoroughly under running water.

5.)  The bus-size will be limitted to 11 bit. The 12th bit will be added only upon arrival of the Mahdi.

6.)  Each computer will come with a chemical spray to clean it off StuxNet-Virus. 


  •  
ComraidsConcubine

So what happens

by ComraidsConcubine on Thu Jun 02, 2011 04:24 AM PDT

 to kosher and karmic internet services in Iran? Will Zorastrians need less battery for their laptops? Somebody shed some light!

I love it when cults come up with these funny things. Questions, questions, questions.


  •  
alx1711

1- Cleansing of "Abr-haye

by alx1711 on Thu Jun 02, 2011 04:18 AM PDT

1- Cleansing of "Abr-haye Siyah"... surely all this cleansing explains Irans drought, as IRI had got rid of all the Abr-haye Siyah!

 2- Halal internet? I assume they soak the cables, monitors, key board etc... 7x times in running water.

this is the same joke as Hassani used to say: Dont drive Benz or BMW as they are made by Ajnabies thefore its Najis. 


  •  
Roozbeh_Gilani

No worries!

by Roozbeh_Gilani on Wed Jun 01, 2011 04:24 PM PDT

In 1979, Nobody had internt. People used guns instead.

"Personal business must yield to collective interest."


  •  
Anahid Hojjati

Someone should do a cartoon on this

by Anahid Hojjati on Wed Jun 01, 2011 03:33 PM PDT

Someone who has cartoon skills (definitely not me) could show a computer network that all computers are being killed with the "zebhe islami" method. Don't ask me how to show a computer being killed with the Zebhe islami method. But I am sure there is a way. Somehow Halal meat and computer networks have to get featured in this cartoon.


  •  
Faramarz

Time to Smuggle 60’s Internet Parts from the West!

by Faramarz on Wed Jun 01, 2011 03:26 PM PDT

If IR’s other creations such as their fighter jets, submarines, space program and nuclear power plants are any indicator of their abilities, it’s going to be one hell of a smuggled 60’s internet!

Get your dumb terminals ready folks!


  •  
hirre

This is really dangerous

by hirre on Wed Jun 01, 2011 03:02 PM PDT

If they manage to create a parallell net they can decide to route all internet traffic to the new net and blocking out all connections to the old WWW or any foreign proxy addresses (IP range filtering). This is ultimately bad for the democracy movement... Hopefully they will not manage this because of the level of complexity involved in changing infrastructure...


  •  
MM

IRI knows the power of WWW and is scared

by MM on Wed Jun 01, 2011 02:54 PM PDT

.


  •