Shahriar Zahedi

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zahedi, i was an iranian party not long ago (in iran) and everyone was a doctor or engineer.  i was introduced to them one by one "this is mr. doctor, this is his house ..." "this lady is ms. engineer...".... i never learnt any of their names.  they were all aghaye doctor/mohandes, khanoom doctor/mohandes.  i didn't tell them about my profession and degrees and no one bothered asking me which was a great relief.  and i don't think anyone remembered my name either. :)

although, i think this phenomenon is endemic in iranian society, some americans (and other nationalities) have also been dropped from the elephant's trunk. 

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زاهدی جان،مقوله جالبی‌ را مَطرح کردید ... قَصد نداشتیم کامِنت بِگزاریمْ تا دیدیم که آخرِ کار تقصیرْ را به گردنِ فرهنگ انداختید و آن وقت اندکی‌ به فکر افتادیم و دست به لرزشْ !

شاید حق با شما باشد، شاید این فرهنگ ماست که هَردَمبیلی شده است و دیگر نمی‌شود تعمیرَش کرد... نمی‌دانیم ،اما میدانیم که ما ایرانیها در بسیاری از جَهات افرادی بسیار مغرور و خود خواه هستیم و شاید این باعث میشود که اخلاق و تربیتمان همیشه مورد بحث باشد و دیگران از ما اشکال گیرند !

ماشا الله همگی یا مهندِسَند و یا دُکتر و خَروار خروار ادعا و از همه بدتر این است که جرات انتقاد از هم را نداریم.

خدا آخر و عاقبت ما ایرانی‌‌ها را به خِیر کند که هیچ نقطه امیدی دیده نمی‌شود !

همیشه پاینده باشید.

اسمت چیه، بابات چیکارست

Shazde,
Thanks for your insightful blog!

The character trait that you described has very deep roots in our culture. You don’t see this behavior at such extremes in other cultures. For example, if you start a conversation with an American sitting next to you on a plane, you generally talk about their hometown, yours, the sports team, the weather or good restaurants. It is all about information exchange, not a heated debate!

Now, when you meet some (not all) Iranians at parties, the first thing that happens is a subtle “resume exchange!” The first thing that they want to establish is that in the “grand scheme of things”, who occupies the higher grounds, you or them! Once that is established, an orderly conversation (as you described!) can begin! One talks and the other one has to listen!

I think this has to do with the hierarchical nature of our culture. As a teenager, I used to go to soccer stadiums with my cousins and watch the games. On one occasion, my cousin and I got there early and stood in line to get the good seats. As the line got crowded and people started pushing and shoving, a policeman (Paaseboon) came to store the order and kick the scalpers out of the line. He looked at my cousin and me and couldn’t figure out if we were from the uptown or downtown! So the Paaseboon with his 5th grade education asked me my name and my father’s profession! (Esmet Chieh, Babat Chikarast!)

Now, if I had said that my last name was Kalbeh Hasan and my father has a tire shop, I would have been pulled out of the line immediately!  

Well, you should scratch your head

when you see so many Mercedes Benzes parked in front of your local cholo kababi!

After an hour, fancy car gets to smell like chos and onion!

//www.youtube.com/watch?v=nviB2Rlm-uY

I've 3 comments

1: Only Iraninas (old fashion) call themselves Doctor or Mohendes. In western countries, nobody present his diplom there is Mr or Mrs.

2: For their defense, all Iranians are experts in everything specially in medecine. As soon as you say you are sick, everybody tell you you should do this or take this drug.

3: Honar nazdeh Iranian Ast o basse but there are many Iranians and not so much Honar ;-)

Yes...

Large fragile egos... khoda midooneh chera.