Azita Shafazand

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Azita Shafazand
by Multiple Personality Disorder
03-Sep-2010
 

Azita Shafazand 

"I wanna put on an ironed shirt"
I wanna be Shafazand at her best
I wanna look my best,
when I meet the President
I’ll take a free trip as his guest

“I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad”
I wanna put on an ironed shirt
I wanna look my best

I wanna talk like the rest
I’ll open a beauty salon
In every town
In every city in Iran
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad

I’m ganna drive the latest Mercedes Benz,
with a license plate that says:
AZITA#1
I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad

I wanna be on the cover of Fars News Agency
Sipping tea with Mahmoud and Mashaei
I wanna say Islam discovered gravity
Mahmoud had a halo on top of his head
Get brownie points in between
I wanna eat kebab half a meter long
Keep eating till I blow my thong

I wanna be on Islamic TV
Talk about my school of beauty

I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
“Oh, every time I close my eyes”
I wanna find a way,
to remove unwanted hair without pain
That’s what I’m researching in my lab
Move over waxing,
tweezing and band
Here comes Azita Shafazand

I’ll do it in a humane way
It's everyone’s human right,
to live a hairless life
Smooth as baby's butt
I’ll do it without a cut

I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
Give me your hairy Faati komandos
Give me your wooly mullahs
Your bearded man
Give me your whiskered zan
I’ll do what I can

Forget Brazilian Wax,
Vajebi, lazer, razer blade
Here comes Azita the Great
I'll epilate your pileous hair
I’ll epilate them for Cyrus the Great

I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
I’ll figure it out in my lab

Forget nasty Nair
I’ll thread your unwanted hair
I’ll discuss it on the air

I wanna be a billionaire so fucking bad
Give me my best ironed shirt
I wanna look the best,
when I meet the President

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divaneh

Loved it

by divaneh on

Another excellent example of your talent MPD Jaan. This is awesome.

Move over waxing,
tweezing and band
Here comes Azita Shafazand

ps. Don't you think she looks like puppets in that photo? You just expect her to bounce up and down instead of walking.


Masoud Kazemzadeh

good job MPD

by Masoud Kazemzadeh on

MPD jaan,

That was hilarious.  You did a fantastic job with the poems.

MK 

 


Javadagha

Thank you and No thank you . . .

by Javadagha on

MPD jaan;

Thanks for the picture of Azita in the conference.  She is walking like a sheer-e-zan.  This picture says a lot about her.

No thank you for your bull-shit.  What a NONE sense!!!  You are using words such as Fucking?! and this website is permitting these none-senses to be printed?

You and others such as Fred and Co. are taking Iranian.com down with you.

 


Monda

Ghashghash! (another one Azarin:)

by Monda on

Zendeh baad MPD!


M. Saadat Noury

Dear MPD

by M. Saadat Noury on

Thanks for sharing. You are a talented person. Some days you should reveal your real name and edit all pieces of your beautiful blog by your true identity. Your stunning poems will shine more for sure.


Gharib

What a fantastic tribute.....

by Gharib on

... to the one who thinks she has "arrived"....

 


Souri

Very smart!

by Souri on

Intelligent and well thought!!!

I truly enjoyed your poem, dear MPD. You are a brillant artist! 


Hoshang Targol

Simply brilliant!

by Hoshang Targol on

Dark hints of Janis Joblin.

"Forget Brazilian Wax,
Vajebi, lazer, razer blade
Here comes Azita the Great
I'll epilate your pileous hair
I’ll epilate them for Cyrus the Great"

Made my day! 

 

 


Azarin Sadegh

This is my last "Lol"...I promise!

by Azarin Sadegh on

Today is such a strange day! I can't stop writing anything other than haha or lol...and it feels so NOT me!(haha)...but I can't come up with intelligent-sounding "haha" or "LOL"...

I love your poem, dear MPD! You are so talented...bravo!


Anahid Hojjati

Dear MPD, this is very smart satire, thanks

by Anahid Hojjati on

 

Dear MPD, thanks for such a great satirical poem. You made me laugh. This poem is about all those pro IRI people who just want to be pro IRI so they have to come up with manufactured reasons for their support of IRI. I liked all of your poem but my favorite part is the following:

 

I wanna be on the cover of Fars News Agency
Sipping tea with Mahmoud and Mashaei
I wanna say Islam discovered gravity
Mahmoud had a halo on top of his head
Get brownie points in between
I wanna eat kebab half a meter long
Keep eating till I blow my thong

 


yolanda

.....

by yolanda on

Hi! MPD,

  Thank you for your hilarious parody of the super popular "Billionaire" song!  You got to find someone (Maz Jobrani or youself....) to sing and record this buffoonish version of the "Billionaire" song......it may become a hit song on you-tube or Persian TV!

Thank you for your contribution to IC and thank you for your ingenuity!

 take care!


Shifteh Ansari

آزیتا شفازند در مصاحبه با خبرگزاری فارس (فالس نیوز):

Shifteh Ansari


//www.farsnews.com/newstext.php?nn=8905270813
"خبرگزاري فارس: شفازند با اشاره به نامه گروه متبوعش به سران كاخ سفيد و هشدار نسبت به هرگونه حمله احتمالي به ايران، گفت: به مسئولان آمريكايي تاكيد كرده‌ايم كه ايران، عراق و افغانستان نيست و هرگونه رفتار تهاجمي اتحاد ملت ايران را منسجم‌تر مي‌كند.
آزيتا شفازند مهندس راه‌ و ساختمان، ايراني مقيم آمريكا و از جمله مدعوين همايش ايرانيان مقيم خارج از كشور بود، در گفت‌وگو با خبرنگار سياسي خبرگزاري فارس، با بيان اينكه عملكرد منفي آمريكا مانع از ارتباط ايران با اين كشور شده است، اظهار داشت: اگر آمريكا مي‌خواهد با ايران ارتباط داشته باشد ابتدا بايد به آرمان‌هاي مردم اين كشور احترام بگذارد و سپس با ادبيات ملت ايران با مسئولان جمهوري اسلامي سخن بگويد.
...
"...


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