Flower delivery in Iran

Alefba

Letters

  Write for The Iranian
Editorial policy

Monday
August 6, 2001

* Not easy to overcome

I can only feel sorry for the late princess, most judgments towards her act were extremely vehement ["Glamorous indeed"]. Suicide cannot be a cause for celebration. One cannot judge her attitude. I certainly do not condone it. She was a young and hopeless soul, one can only feel sorry for her and her family that her life was to have such a sad and unpredictable end. She appeared as one of the most joyful souls in the Pahlavi family.

I myself suffer from depression for personal reasons and it is not a state which is easy to overcome. Leila's fate should only open our eyes on the importance of being more alert on the hoplessness that can hit any individual due to life pressures, lack of love and or the loss of someone dear.

I can only extend my sympathy to the Pahlavi family, their grief is immense, and that has nothing to do with politics in general. I clearly recall Reza Pahlavi being interviewed after Khomeini's death by a journalist and his reponse was that it is not to me but to God to judge him.

I don't want to sound moralistic, but few Iranians showed the same respect in regard to Leila's death. I don't know the pahlavis more than anyone else. But I can only imagine the state of grief Leila went through. I just wish her soul to rest in peace. True she was no Lady Diana, but Diana was no angel either, even if she did some humanitarian action, simply because she was exposed to them.

All I can say is that rich or poor, depression is the disease of the century. In my lifetime I saw many young iranians both in Iran and outside who claimed to suffer from it mostly because of their memories of Iran, or because they saw their parents' grief and felt helpless, thus ignoring t their own life and future. All I wish for my generation and those to come is a better future, and faith in themselves.

During the past twenty years how many times did we see and hear young Iranians publically commiting suicide because they were fed up with life in Iran and could not escape it? One thing many compatriots forget is that before the miracle of the internet, Iranians avoided to talk to each other because of fear. That's at least true in Europe, where Islamic death squads were a constant menace.

It is easy today to cry out our patriotism after the world cup revolution, and the courage of Iranian filmakers who, like others, are paving the way towards democracy in their own way. However in the 80's and early 90's Iranians feared each other, or at least it was convenient to avoid each other. Many were ashamed to say they were Iranian simply beccause once you said you were Iranian you were immediately typcasted as a terrorist, and if you were not competent enough you would be refused a decent job.

I know doctors and judges who have become taxi drivers or work in grocery stores. Imagine the humiliation for their kids. As for Leila, she indeed did a foolish and irreversible thing which is regretful. Life still continues despite her death. It's a cruel reality. All I can say I don't wish anyone to fall into depression of any sort because it's self destructive, and it takes time, often years to get over.

Leila rest in peace.

Darius Kadivar

* Depression is a disease

It behooves all wisdom the ignorance and ironic arrogance of Ms. Dowlatshahi ["Glamorous indeed"]. Her perspective is lopsided and from one angle only, her own. She seems to subscribe to the old school of thought, that if someone's feeling down, just give him a swift kick in the rear, and make them snap out of it. She also seems to be an honorary doctor of medicine that is specialized in practicing psychiatry.

One advice to Ms. Dowlatshahi, DON'T PRACTICE MEDICINE WITHOUT A LICENSE! Now here's a little lesson from some qualified to dispense medical opinions: Depression is a disease. It is consuming disease. It is a helpless and hopeless state of mind. Depressed people do not ask to be in a state of melancholy. They don't want to feel down, and believe it or not they don't even like to commit suicide. They seek treatment in the hopes of ending their agonizing mental state, not to end their lives.

Ironically those that do commit suicide, are in the recovering stages of their disease. They have seen the bipolar (manic-depression) swings too often and just when they gain enough strength to collect themselves they attempt to end their lives.

Leila Pahlavi, regardless of her status or name, was a human being. Someone who reached the low point of her mental state. Somewhere which I hope Ms. Dowlatshahi and the likes of her will never have the displeasure of reaching.

Leila Pahlavi, did not ask to be compared to Princess Diana. She led a low-key life, because nowadays people who are not so, usually wind up with their heads cut off.

Another thing is that had she been active the way you now expect her to have been, you and your fellow critics would find something else to complain about. Because that is the way you are. My suggestion let her soul rest in peace and leave her alone. Find someone else to pick on, someone who is alive and able to at least answer back. And remember, don't practice medicine without a license!

Afshin Deyhimpanah

* Would make anyone suicidal

You have written about the loss of life of our princess as if it was something to be ashamed of. She couldn't contain the feelings of depression any longer. As an Iranian, and as someone who had been sent to exile at the age of 13 and never returned to my country, I can just feel the disorientation that Princess Leila must have felt at her time in exile.

Your comparisons of Priness Leila and Princess Diana are totally off the mark. If you were more aware of psychological effects of loosing your roots, then you would not have made such comparisons.

Diana was a woman scorned who wished to prove to her husband she could do better than him. Having said that, don't get me wrong I have a lot of respect for Diana as she fought well at her darkest hours. However, the disrespect that Leila's family suffered from Iranians of all classes was enough to put anyone off any Iranian and of any human beings (and that by the way is my own thoughts and feelings and no one else's).

The injustice of life after her father spent his life for the well being of Iran would make anyone suicidal!

Lida Sheybani

* TOTALLY intolerable

Aghayeh Hedayat, ["If we tolerated each other"]

Again you're going on and on about tolerance, and now you're implying that I must be a member of "The Regime" for saying what everyone knows about the MKO: they are traitors to all Iranians and the entire nation of Iran. Let me again make this simple and clear-cut: tolerance is a good thing. Like everything else, it has limits too.

Treason is TOTALLY intolerable. If we should tolerate the MKO's treason, then we might as well "tolerate" Saddam's murderous attacks on Iran too. Treason is INTOLERABLE, whether in Iran, in the USA, in Spain, or in any other country, and under ANY kind of regime. The MKO committed pure and simple TREASON, by any definition of that term, when they sided with Saddam's forces and took up arms against their own (former) countrymen.

Whether I am associated with "The Regime" or not, whether any of my family members were killed in the war or not, and whether you're associated with the MKO or not, does not make the SLIGHTEST bit of difference regarding this historical FACT.

VassalAm, nAmeh tamAm.

J. Mohammadi

* Nearly nothing being sacred

What an open exchange of letters on civil rights could possibly have to do with advocating an "election boycott movement", after the election at that, is an enigma. Nevertheless, Moji Agha's letter ["Continuation of Mossadegh"] demonstrates the need for the propagation of civil rights in Iran.

Mr. Khatami could be the best thing that has happened to Iran since the invention of sangak and his election "the most democratic". Neither negates the right to challenge those assertions -- without being labeled as a "backstabber" and a cast of the sequel to TPAJAX.

Just as Agha has the inalienable right to say Khatami represents "the continuation of what Mossadegh was trying to do", one has the right to claim an inherent flaw in his statement. That, one was an avow laic bound by the earthly law which can be amended or replaced. The other, a career proponent of the eternal divine law. Questioning divine law in Iran is blasphemy, carrying severe mandatory punishment.

Everyone has the right to speak their mind, erroneous or not, nearly nothing being sacred.

Shahriar Zangeneh

* International joke

This morning I jumped out of a "real" sauna and into Lake Baikal and finished the morning with a delicious, fresh, seafood meal. "jaatoon khaali". Later I found this internet cafe. What a pleasure it was to read Iranian.com from the middle of Siberia, and see our happy Iranian in "ghorbat" family bickering on as usual. A tree of genuine democracy in Iran!

Every time I read letters from Peerooz ["73-year chance"] or Moji Agha ["Continuation of Mossadegh"], I think surely they are pulling our leg. They can't be serious when they talk of our democratic elections and people voting for Khatami AGAIN. With two mollas and six sons of mollas to vote for (see article) and not a single independent body (foreign or Iranian) monitoring the ballots are they testing the water to see who will suggest wide-spread fraud in the provinces? Why sing the tune of a sore looser when the whole election process ends up an international joke!

Is the people's mass depression, lethargic call to action, rampant crime, corruption, prostitution, disrespect for Shiite theology not even a hint for our reformist friends? Have they figured a new definition for democracy, where only the political interest of the Islamic revolutionaries who trashed our nation and their choice of who is more Islamic or more revolutionaries are up for vote. Was there a single charismatic leader / motivator with non-revolutionary principles to raise our (Iranian) spirits?

Then I shudder to think maybe Peerooz, Moji Agha and their "baraadaraan and khaaharaan" really mean all that they say. After all, as irrational and extra-terrestrial as their opinions are, what happened to the army officers who had guaranteed our peace so well when they told our "baraadaraan" not to agitate Iraq for Islamic Revolution when their military is so mobile? They were killed or imprisoned. And when they were taken out of prison to fight the "imposed" war and march to Jerusalem, what happened when they said stop wasting life by sending kids into traps and poison gas ­ use our resources strategically ­ don't divide our power with the pasdaran.

They killed hundreds of thousands of our boys, destroyed our military might, turned down cease-fire pleadings from Saddam Hussein, financed the Monte Carlo yacht club through arms dealer commissions, and left a million handicapped, orphaned, broken individuals for society to care for. And if that is not a "fateheh" of the Islamic Revolutionaries right there, what happened to these officers who gained the pasdaaraan's respect and ultimately pushed Iraq out? They were imprisoned again for 6 to 8 months for being "saltanat talab"!

And now our Islam and democracy ideology friends, having "reedan" to the very fabric of our society insist on everyone to step aside, it's none of your business, we will fix everything. It will mean a second generation of Iranian lives (that's us by the way) being wasted, but hey, that's OK because we will put a structure in place that means mollas will rule for the next 2,500 years. Peeroz, Moji Agha. Take a look at this!

Amir-Khosrow Sheibany

* Foundation of love

Hi Sahar,

I both agree and disagree with your comments ["Long hard look"]. The first comment I have to make is that you invite all men to look at themselves but your offer "goes also for some ladies". Why some ladies? In my personal opinion, in this game of Iranian love, both men and women are responsible for problems and misunderstandings that exists between the two sexes.

I believe both men and women, including yourself, must look at themselves at length. I say this based on your comment about your "best" friends and that you "wouldn't start dating any of em any time soon." The Oxford dictionary defines the word "best" as "excelling all others". So, my question is if your friends excel all others, why would you not even consider dating them? This is why you must also look at yourself and what you want from men or more specifically, Iranian men.

Now, I will be very general and for the sake of fairness, shall include myself in the generalizations that I am about to discuss. The problem with Iranian men is that what qualities they look for in their prospective wives, they do not want to see in their prospective girlfriends. They want their girlfriends to show skin, and put out when they have the urge. But from a wife, they want chastity and purity.

The problem with Iranian women is that what they are willing to forgive in non-Iranians, they shall never forgive in Iranian men. An Iranian female dating a non-Iranian will simply push him back if he attempts to kiss her. She will smile and say that she is not ready and that he should give her for time. Now, if an Iranian men attempted this, all hell will break loose and the man would be considered the most horrendous rapist of all time.

Let's be fair and realize that we all have problems and need to work on them. Rather than spending precious time discussing what the opposite should do, we should look into what WE should do. I did my share and God rewarded me with a wife who worships me. There doesn't go a day that I do not thank God for crossing our paths and I shall forever worship her.

We have our difficult times and share of disagreements, but the underlying basis of our love remains the same. We agreed on the foundation of our love being of cement and concrete. We disagree and debate the paint on the walls and what should decorate this love. However, the foundation shall forever remain intact. We took time and looked at ourselves!

Regards,

Abbas Soltani

* An Iranian woman might be...

In response to "Long hard look", an Iranian woman might be a person who:

* Is so emotional that she ruins her son or duaghter's marriage in the role of mother-in-law.

* Doesn't feel free because she is an Iranian -- not European. Therefore, she blames her husband and takes vengeance.

* Keeps other people's secrets but not her husband's.

* She helps her husband and expects him to do the same in return immediately.

* If her husband is abusive, she tolerates him until she is badly hurt.

Liable

* Never be the same

WOW! It's a pretty powerful piece loaded with strong emotions ["Faaseleh"]. I live in Newport Beach and go for a long walk along the shoreline quite often, but I guess from now on, it will never be the same.

I loved your analogies, and believe it or not for a moment or two, I choked while reading your piece, especially the "good bye" part and "back in the house with windows open and the breeze bringing in the soft sound of crickets."

I guess your piece touched something deep within me that I thought had died inside me, but then I now know that it will never go away. You touched a piece of my soul and made me face a long lost feeling and a memory, albeit bitter-sweet. And for this, I thank you.

Hamid

* A joke?

I enjoyed your "FAQ". But why do you use a Rrumi? He is not so good with your view of GOD. Are you telling the truth about not beliving in GOD or is it a joke. Please feature HAFEZ, SADI, NIMA and other poets as well.

Thank you,

Homa Karim

* Absolutely hillarious

I had the pleasure of watching Mr. Bahrami play tennis in Cincinnati this past weekend in the Tennis Masters Series. Absolutely hillarious and brilliant!

Andrea Walczak

Comment for The Iranian letters section

RELATED

August 2001
Archived letters

Letters index
Letters sent to The Iranian in previous months

Email us

Flower delivery in Iran
Copyright © Iranian.com All Rights Reserved. Legal Terms for more information contact: times@iranian.com
Web design by BTC Consultants
Internet server Global Publishing Group