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Poetry

Rivals - football fans

By Mahsa J
April 22, 2003
The Iranian

This is the story of Marky Mark      
Who thought he was the great white shark      
A colleague in London, he came from Ireland    
A rugby fan, he'd rock this island
 
Wearing green, he'd come round to boast
How his team ate England like toast
Whenever Ireland won a game
Around came Mark with no sign of shame
 
To piss them off, those English fans
He'd wave his flag and make demands
Poor England fans, he'd fuck them off
His antics really made me laugh!
 
Until the day when destiny chose
To bring Iran and Ireland close
In Tehran, a game of football to plan
Which one would be off to Japan
 
I used this chance to warn his prowess
His rival was now the Persian goddess
He could now call me Her Royal Highness
For I am the descendent of Cyrus
 
No surprise that day to see
Children of Churchill were nice to me!
England fans then decided to fully
Support the Iran team and yours truly
 
Alas, on the day of the match
I was in a bit of a dash
To board a plane for Tokyo
Few months early to start the show
 
I had to wait one whole day
To know the outcome of the play
Got an email from Mark, no doubt to gloat
How his team had rocked the boat!
 
He knocked me out of my full glory
Followed by more rage and fury
An email to him I chose to write
With words so strong to win this fight:
 
Oh dear god, here we go
An Irishman and his big ego

Gone so high, it hit the sky
In a few months time it'll surely die

In the land of the rising sun
Ireland has no chance to shine

All of McCarthy's top rank players
Are England's high taxpayers

For they all play in English clubs
No wonder they can score some shots!

The boys of the Persian land
Did real good and proud to stand

You can't take away the fact
That you played shite last night n' packed

We still beat you in this game
With such a header, it made you tame!

So you're going to Japan
Make sure shit don't hit the fan

In the true spirit of the game
Ireland has no chance for fame

To give you a final clue
Pull a pint of the good black brew

If I were you I would not take the chance
And I would stick to Riverdance!'

 
Needless to say, after that Mark and I
Never really said more than hi!

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